Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Send Ash your love...and also Jewlery, Fruit Baskets, Cash, etc.


Remember that time the old man came into my office and felt me up? Who was the first person I called? Remember when Chris fired me? Who was the first one I told? For some reason, I've always gone straight to you with all that stuff. Now my working conditions are better, but I forget that you guys are still in the no-labor-laws trenches. Let me just say that you are better than that dank, evil little gossip mill. And look at the benefits...

- No more Apple-Queen Bathroom Scenarios
- No more Whitney Houston
- No more Lady wearing a paper clip in her hair
- No more stinky, wierd and downright creepy Old Men.
- No more Ice Queen Office managers
- No more Bad Mascara Ladies! (wish I could say the same)
- No more Maternity Wear Tragedies!
- No more moldy paneling
- No more parking lot full of nails and broken glass

I hope that helps. I am just so mad I could spit! However, my cat is trying to eat a spider so that one may have to wait.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Random Observation

I've noticed this at just about every supermarket I've ever been in. While perusing the juice aisle for some Cran-Grape or maybe a nice Pink Grapefruit juice, my eyes wander up to the top shelf where I see....Clam Juice.


I understand that this is an ingredient necessary for Clam Chowder. But could we Please just keep it in the soup aisle? Or on top of the seafood cabinet? When it's in with the rest of the juice, it's impossible for me to stop thinking about pouring myself a big glass of...Clam Juice.

With Ice.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Your Family Stone is a Turd

WHO told me that I would like the movie The Family Stone(starring Sara Jessica Parker and the ever-yummy Luke Wilson)?!? Remind me to step on that person's toe really, really hard.

I hated, Hated, HATED this movie. Maybe I'm overly sensitive, maybe I Identified with it a bit too much, maybe I just really don't like Diane Keaton and this film made me outright hate her. In any case, I know what it's like to be an outsider in a significant other's family, to be completely misunderstood, shut out, shuffled aside. Thank bejeebus BOBI's family is nothing like that, that they are as kind and giving as he is.

In other news, I've been having dreams so bad I don't want to go to sleep. As if my insomnia needed a helping hand.