Punnygirl

Early morning nerdery

2011-09-23T06:40:00.000-04:00

I decided that next year, when I'm visiting California, I want to make a point of driving up to Big Sur to see the giant Redwoods.

And I must do so dressed exactly like Kim Novak in Vertigo.

Or else what's the point?

The Pander House

2011-09-19T18:42:00.002-04:00

If you have stumbled here randomly or if you are one of my three friends who still reads this, I would like to recommend a podcast. Anyone who knows me knows that I love bad movies. Hello, 'The Abominable Dr. Phibes' is one of my favorite movies of all time.

But what about movies that come out now? Well, yeah, most of them are crap. And none of them can capture the delight you feel when you see Vincent Price conducting a clockwork symphony, or putting on his Vincent Price mask or killing a lady with brussel sprouts and locusts. But I digress.

The Mask Wears The Man?

For a hilarious spin on the crap films of today, I can't recommend The Flop House highly enough. Though honestly, every episode contains minimal talk about movies. A lot of it is the guys digressing into discussions about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Underwater Sex (anyone tried it?), The best way to kill Scrooge McDuck (drown him in his pool of money) and what would happen if Penny from Inspector Gadget met a Dinosaur. Start from the beginning and work your way up, because there are occasionally callbacks to previous episodes, not to mention some very undefined contests with no discernible prizes and a saga of a patchy, peg-legged cat.

I want to marry this video...

2010-06-01T11:43:00.002-04:00

Don't you?

All the ladies...

2010-05-28T12:01:00.013-04:00

I like to watch a lot of TCM and AMC, it's part of what gave me my inspiration for the story I've been working on. A lot of times when I'm watching these old movies I'll see an actress and think "Oh she would make a great Jane, if I were filming this story in 1948." I know, I need a life. Thank you.

Here are just a few of said inspirations, enjoy!

Lizzy - Hedy Lamarr

She's got a wholesome, sort of good-girl vibe, but looks like she'd have a great sense of humor.

Jane - Carole Landis

This is one of the few actresses I came across that was smiling in most of her photos. It seems that pouting was very popular in the Golden Age of Cinema.

Caroline - Ella Raines

She's gonna get you!

Claire Connelly - Anna Neagle

She looks sweet, doesn't she? Like the popular girl in school that you wanted to hate but just couldn't.

Anne - Gene Tierney

To me, Anne is sort of perpetually sad.

Georgiana - Janet Blair
It's almost impossible to find photos of young, brunette actresses from the 1940's. Janet definitely has the face though, she looks innocent and good-natured.

Kitty and Lydia - Joan and Constance Bennet

These two look like trouble, don't they?

Mrs. Bennet - Barbara Stanwyck

She's got the vapors! Quick, grab her smelling salts!

Catherine - Marlene Dietrich

Oh Marlene. I could only find about 2 photos of the woman where she doesn't have a cigarette hanging out of her mouth. I've always thought she looked very forbidding, much like Lady C!

Photo Friday: The Host, Video Edition

2010-05-21T11:54:00.002-04:00

I came across the below fan video for Stephenie Meyer's 'The Host' yesterday. I know that it's going to be adapted to a movie, imdb shows the release date as 2011. If you are rolling your eyes and groaning about sparkly vampires, you can cut it out this instant. Meyer's website calls The Host 'science fiction for people who don't like science fiction'. Well, I do like science fiction, and The Host is still pretty damned good.

What makes this story different is that as soon as you open it, you see that we've already lost. Earth has been successfully invaded. Sound familiar? Like...Twelve Colonies familiar? Though the Host invaders are actually aliens and not robots, the premise works for the exact same reason Battlestar Galactica worked. The human race is reduced to almost nothing, hiding and scavenging while trying to keep a Resistance going. And while the invaders (who call themselves 'Souls') don't have a great agenda like the Cylons did, other than bringing 'peace' to our world, we are nevertheless used as pods for their peas.

The story is about Melanie Stryder, a human woman who is part of the resistance gets captured and implanted with Wanderer, who is sort of the Steve Irwin of Souls, but female. Wanderer has access to Melanie's memories, and is tasked with trying to use those memories to root out the human resistance. But instead of turning them over, Wanderer seeks them out. Melanie is still partially at the wheel, and what follows is one of the most unexpected and surprisingly intelligent stories I've ever read. I can't really do it justice here, and besides this isn't 'Windbag Friday', it's 'Photo Friday', so Here is a great review of the book. Read it, it's good, that's all.

I've been looking around, and apparently a lot (a LOT) of people are loving Jensen Ackles as Melanie's lover Jared. I have to confess, he'd never even entered my mind (I'd always thought more along the lines of Charlie Hunam) but as soon as I saw this video, it clicked for me. I can't really picture anyone else as him now. It looks as though Ian Somerhalder is being rumored to play Ian O'Shea, the human man who begins to fall for Wanderer (not Melanie, it's a regular love quadrangle and very well done). I don't have a problem with that, but I do like the idea of Jared Padalecki better. Ian and Kyle (twins) are suppossed to be big guys, and Jared's definitely got the range it would take to play both parts. Here's hoping!

As Promised...

2010-05-10T23:33:00.000-04:00

Here the bit of writing I've been working on. I've only posted the first 3 chapters, when I got up from my computer today I had just finished 12.

It is a Pride & Prejudice story (naturally, you didn't think I was reading all of those Darcy books for the hell of it, did you?).

IF you are interested I will give you a little backstory. Just after WWII, Lt. Colonel Richard Fitzwilliam meets a young Elizabeth Bennet while on vacation in Charleston, SC. Three years later, Elizabeth is home from college when a young wealthy bachelor named Mr. Bingley buys the property closest to her family's home, Longbourn Farm.

I've stuck with the basics of the P&P plot, with a few changes. It's relatively easy to transplant the characters into the south, a lot southern people (sorry, but especially older folks) still use a very proper way of speaking so that helps.

In any case, I'm trying to get more chapters ready for upload, if anyone cares. In the meantime, here are a couple of exchanges that I was kind of proud of. The first is between Lizzy and Jane, and the second between Lizzy and Darcy. Feedback is welcome, but be gentle, I'm fragile in the region of my Ego.

::Mr. Bingley Stuffs His Face::
Elizabeth, smiling at Jane said, “You would think that your Mr. Bingley had never had eaten before the way he inhaled that food.” Jane blushed, thinking she’d barely touched her food for watching Mr. Bingley eat.

“He did tell me that neither of his sisters ever learned to cook. They have a cook but Mr. Bingley gave her a month off to visit her daughter in Raleigh. I think he’s been having to make do with Caroline’s cooking for the past few weeks.”

“Ah, that explains it then. I think Mama took it as a great compliment to you. Though how she figures a man stuffing eight pieces of chicken in his mouth is a compliment to a lady, I’ll never understand.”

“It was hardly eight pieces, but I understand your point.” Jane sighed dreamily, as if stuffing his face with fried chicken was the most romantic thing she’d ever seen. Elizabeth was determined, however, to be diplomatic.

::Mr. Darcy is tricked into helping Elizabeth in her garden::
Bent to her work, she didn’t speak, and he decided to break the silence first.

“Can I help you with that, Miss Elizabeth?”
Without looking up she said, “And muss that fine crease? How could I live with myself, Mr. Darcy? No, if you don’t mind your current employment, this’ll be but a moment’s work.” He shook his head, surprised to find himself enjoying her teasing barbs. Something else occurred to him and he broke the silence again.

“May I ask you a question?”

“You may.”

“Your father mentioned you went to college.”

“That, Mr. Darcy, was not a question, as any college-educated lady could tell you.”

“Thank you, Miss Elizabeth. I was going to ask what you studied.”

Photo Friday: Peter Bishop

2010-05-07T13:33:00.001-04:00

Math never looked so good.

Peter is quickly becoming one of my favorite characters on TV. He always seems so calm and collected. Joshua Jackson plays him with such intensity you get the impression that he's not calm, only tightly coiled and ready to spring any second. He's got a brilliant mind, and a charm that only comes with being slightly vague and rather mysterious, but he also seems to have this sweet, sunny innocence too.

It doesn't hurt that Jackson, who was always a decent actor (you know he was the only reason you watched The Creek) has come into his own over the past few years. Not to mention he is certifiably gorgeous. Even if inter-dimensional scientific espionage isn't your thing, isn't this reason enough to watch Fringe?

I love a good scowl. Seriously, I do.

Peter and Olivia, this picture is smokin' hot!

Team Free Will Triumphs (Sort of) Again

2010-05-05T11:46:00.001-04:00

I have calmed down enough now to have a few thought's on last night's Lost. I plan to be liberal with spoilers after the jump...

I noticed in the second half of last season, somewhere around 'What Happened, Happened' that something was different. Someone was different. All of the sudden, I found myself liking Jack.
I have spent the past 4 1/2 seasons absolutely hating the guy. In my defense, he was Self righteous pretty boy with a God complex, then he was a pathetic loser with a fug beard and an oxycontin habit to rival Rush Limbaugh. Then, watching him struggle to manage being Ben Linus' butt boy and trying to coax everyone back to the island, I started to be intrigued. I do wonder if returning to the island cured him of his addiction, the way it cured Locke's spine, Rose's cancer and Jin's...er...junk. But that's beside the point.

Watching him take the passive route last season, sitting back and playing the role of Dharma Janitor and giving us all a break from his Follow-me schtick gave us a chance to see a Jack who was more reconciled to his path than ever before. And no small part of this I think was due to his guilt over being responsible for Locke's suicide. (I was going to put that in quotations, but realized that Locke would have done it anyway had Ben not shown up, so it still counts) He's now become a champion of the Real John Locke, and has spent all season defending the guy's memory and motives, and in the sideways world going so far as saving his life and trying to put him on the path of letting go. The conversation between Sideways Jack and Sideways Locke in the hospital hallway was brilliant (and beautifully acted by both actors) for both characters, and the point of it all I think was to prove a point to the viewers. Since day 1 of this show these two have been polarized. Man of Science and a Man of Faith. Last night's episode did away with all of those pretensions, it tore down the wall between them and we could see that they were really the same person after all. It was an excellent piece of television.

Of course then there was some house-cleaning to be done. Smokey is a clever little bastard, no doubt about that. Of course I never bought the whole "I can't cross water" thing, and figured that was a lie. I was also surprised that he kept Claire alive after the sub started to dive, since I'm pretty sure she's not a candidate. I'm thinking he'll use her for cannon fodder before it's all said and done.

The bomb was a nice parallel to Jack and Sawyer's fight over Jughead. Sawyer trusted Jack once already and it cost him the woman he loved. Not to mention he lost all faith in Jack in the process, which in the long run was far more damaging. I have no doubt that had Sawyer left the damn C4 alone like Jack said, we'd still have Sun, Jin, Sayid and Frank. When Sawyer finally wakes up, he will probably feel even worse than Jack did after Juliet's death. And speaking of insanely tense explosions...Finally we got Sayid back. I figured last week that Desmond was still alive, and that he got through to Sayid and got him out of his zombie state. He came back, Free Will intact, and fell on the bomb to save the rest. You will be missed, Sayid Jarrah.

I'm going to gloss over the rest so bear with me...

Sun & Jin got a tragic, but beautiful ending. I went to the Television Without Pity forums immediately after and there were already five pages of people saying "Fuck You, Lost!" and ranting about leaving little Ji Yeon an orphan. I didn't mind that part as much as I think I should have. They both knew that their daughter was safe, wealthy, and would be loved. When Jack was dragging Sawyer out of the Sub and and Jin shared that last look...I will admit that's when my waterworks started, and they didn't stop for the rest of the episode. Even now I've got lint or something in my eye, dang it. You will be missed, Sun and Jin Kwon.

I feel like I should say something about Frank Lapidus, even though he's been tragically underused this season. I really think they kept him around as much as they did because, with Sawyer so angry and grieving over Juliet's death and Miles getting very little screen time, they needed someone to deliver humorously dry quips. I'm glad he got one last one in before the end, and that we got the joy of the nickname "Chesty" while he was on the show. You will be missed, Frank Lapidus.

One last thought. Jorge Garcia. Sir, please submit for an Emmy. Of course sweet Hurley, who has lost so much, would keenly feel the deaths of two friends. Remember Hurley was the only one of the Oceanic 6 that came to see Sun after the baby was born, and to visit Jin's memorial. His unrestrained sobs on the beach just. KILLED me. I can only hope that grief will not harden him or make him reckless, I have a feeling if Hurley does not survive the finale then Cuse and Lindelof will have to deal with an old-fashioned angry mob, torches and all.

Relations Such As These

2010-04-29T13:19:00.001-04:00

I have come across some fairly horrid and fairly excellent self-published books based on Pride & Prejudice lately, I think this one falls somewhere in the middle. Plot aside, never have I seen a book so badly in need of an editor!!! I've never seen so many spelling mistakes and quotation crimes in my life! After about four pages, I had to grab my sharpie ultrafine and start adding quotations myself, in case I decide to re-read this book in the future. More about this book after le saut...

Other than that, I enjoyed the premise of this book, and the plot definitely kept me involved, but it lost a lot of points with me for the sex. I can accept some well-written sex scenes in a P&P retelling, but well-written these were not. Though they aren't as bad as some, they were in no way good. Add to that that it was premarital, not just with Lizzy and Darcy but Jane and Bingley?!? No no no no no.

This retelling has a rather amusing start when Elizabeth, while traipsing through the woods, accidentally spies Darcy, Colonel Fitzwilliam and Bingley swimming in a pond at Netherfield. When she finally meets the gentlemen, she realizes it's the same men she happened to see nude, which makes her even more awkward. However, Darcy and Elizabeth seem to come together fairly quickly in this version, and the rest of the book is spent on plots and intrigue and relatives behaving very, very badly. Viscount James Fitzwilliam, the Colonel's older brother, makes a fairly decent villain, especially when teamed up with Lady Catherine and Caroline Bingley. If he had a mustache, he'd be twirling it.

I very much enjoyed the portions of the story that were spent on Colonel Fitzwilliam, and would have liked to have more of that and less of his James & Caroline's scheming. Fitzwilliam seemed to me to be the unsung (almost tragic) hero of this book. He's not portrayed as perfect as Darcy, but that is maybe why I liked him better. Fitzwilliam is Cheated by Lady Catherine, Duped by his brother and his mistress, and finds himself in love with Elizabeth only to have her fall for & marry his richer, handsomer, slightly more moral cousin. Sara O'Brien could have made the whole book about him and I wouldn't have complained.

Casting a Project That Will Probably Never Happen, Even Though It Would Kick Ass

2010-04-25T12:30:00.004-04:00

There has been some back and forth, some "Will he or won't he" talk about JJ Abrams and Daniel Lindelof adapting Stephen King's Dark Tower Series for film or television. The last word on this was that it wasn't going to be adapted anytime soon, with Lindelof just wrapping up Lost it would probably be a pretty huge feat to pull off something with such a big mythology as DT. However, the speculations still abound and a few days ago I came across This Site with their ideas for DT Casting. Some of them I have no Problem with...others I'm not so sure. And since I think I rock at this sort of thing, I'm going to give it a shot myself. I'm putting in a jump since this is an image-heavy post...Click Images to Enlarge...

Roland Deschain - Richard Armitage

Tall? Check. Dark hair? Check. Blue Eyes? Check. Intense Expression? CHECK, yo. Roland is of "undetermined" age (some say he may be over 1000 years old), and is the last vestige of a dead world, the sole survivor of the "Line of Eld" (his world's version of King Arthur).

Runners Up: Daniel Day-Lewis, Michael Fassbender, Josh Holloway

Eddie Dean - Jensen Ackles

Jensen actually looks like what Eddie is described as, good looking with light brownish hair and hazel eyes. And we already know from Supernatural he looks good with a gun! I have no doubt he could pull off the Wisecracking Junkie-turned-Gunslinger.
Runners Up: James McAvoy, Casey Affleck, Ryan Kwanten

Susannah Dean - Rutina Wesley

I love her on True Blood, but regardless I think she'd be perfect to play a wheelchair-bound warrior with split personalities. She'd have to switch between the sweet and refined Odetta Susannah Holmes and the devilish Detta Susannah Walker, and then later carry an evil spider baby. I think she could handle it. Runners Up: Gina Torres, Kerry Washington, Rosario Dawson

Jake Chambers - Nathan Gamble

Jake is the youngest gunslinger, I believe he's only 13 but looks younger. Roland sees him as a son, and thinks he might be a reincarnation of his old friend Alain Johns, who like Jake had the psychic touch. Runners Up: Freddy Highmore, I don't know any other kid actors.

Cuthbert Allgood - Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Joseph Gordon-Levitt was also Unreality's pick (and this is partially their photo- thanks!) and I can't but agree. JG-L has really come into his own over the past few years, I'm really looking forward to seeing him in Inception. Always quick with a joke and quicker with a slingshot, Cuthbert was the predecessor (in more ways than one) to Eddie Dean in Roland's original band of Gunslingers. I've always hoped that King would give us a novella told from Cuthbert's point of view, it would be a perfect balance of comedy and tragedy.

Alain Johns - Charlie Hunnam

This is yet another instance where I wholeheartedly agree with Unreality's list. Another member of Roland's original Posse, Alain Johns was more thoughtful than Roland and better tempered than Cuthbert. Charlie Hunnam has already proven how well he can handle a gun in Cold Mountain and Sons of Anarchy.

Susan Delgado - Emma Watson

Emma Watson is so lovely, she has the innocence and spirit that would beautifully capture Roland's tragic first (and only) love Susan.

I'm going to work my way around to all the "B" characters at some point, I just want to throw one more at you...

Flagg/Marten/Walter - Alan Tudyk

If anyone has the range to play the gleefully psychotic Flagg, it's Alan Tudyk. He already proved his bad guy chops with Alpha on Dollhouse, and I still say if Christopher Nolan ever wants to put the Joker in another Batman movie, Alan's the guy to do it.

UPDATE: The latest word is is that Abrams, Cuse and Lindelof are off the table, and the most interested party at this point is Ron Howard, Brian Grazer & Akiva Goldsman. Not who I would have picked, that's for damn sure.

The Young Victoria

2010-04-21T20:59:00.000-04:00

Emily Blunt? Good. Paul Bettany? Good. Rupert Friend? Gooooooooooood. Watch it. That's all.

Jane Eyre 1997: Robots, Mustaches and Rupert Penry-Jones!

2010-04-18T23:10:00.001-04:00

So I finally got over my wariness of Ciarán Hinds' mustache and watched the 1997 A&E version of Jane Eyre starring Mr. Hinds as Rochester and Samantha Morton as Jane. I did enjoy it, for the most part, and I realize that not every version has the benefit of a good budget the way the 2006 miniseries undoubtedly did. Taking that into account I still get incredibly frustrated when they gloss over the last part of the story (the events that take place after Jane leaves Thornfield). I really don't care all that much about young orphan Jane and Mr. Brocklehurst, etc. I want to dive right in to the juicy Rochester parts! This was my biggest complaint, other than that I found myself pleasantly surprised by this version.

Samantha Morton is a fine actress, and she plays Jane very well, though at times I found her voice a little (no, very) Robotic. Her interpretation of Jane didn't seem to be terribly self-possessed or self-assured the way Jane is. At times it seems like she has "been trampled on". I wish she could have played her with a little more backbone, watching the proposal scene she seemed more terrified of Rochester than anything. That being said, she still was perfectly capable of the material, I just wish she had done a bit more with it. That, and the voice-overs were unnecessary and sometimes confusing.

The green frock coat and the top hat makes me want cereal for some reason...

On the other hand, Ciarán Hinds (who I also love) almost did a little too much with Edward Rochester. He was certainly the crankiest, surliest version of Rochester I've ever seen! Maybe it's the timbre of his voice that gives it that rough edge. Though, oddly enough he was nicer to Adele in this film. In any event, I really came to love this version of Rochester. Hinds played him with a passionate, wild and unapologetic desperation. He might be the closest an actor has come to Brontë's character. I love Toby Stephens and his portrayal will always be first place (unless Michael Fassbender knocks it out of the park) but he did seem to be a gentler and more sensual Rochester than the character from the book. And Hinds deftly handles the very changeable moods of Mr. Rochester. I think if not for his performance this would have been an ultimately forgettable movie.

The Moor House part of the story, as I mentioned, was very much pared down. It's never mentioned that Jane is related to St. John and Diana (no Mary or Hannah is this one) but at one point they are calling each other "brother" and "sister" out of the blue. Huh? St. John was played by certified dreamboat Rupert Penry-Jones, who you might know as playing a very foxy (though slightly wooden) Captain Wentworth in the BBC's 2007 remake of Jane Austen's Persuasion. All I want to know is why is St. John Rivers suddenly so happy and bubbly? There was none of the religious fire and cold manipulation of the character in this portrayal. To me, it's one of the most important aspects of the story! St. John's "proposal" is bitterly, sharply different from Rochester's, who actually loves Jane. Reading those scenes in the book, he seems to almost haunt Jane like a ghost in order to bend her to his will. If I could describe the character of St. John in a word, it would be "suffocating". Not so here. Here he's just a cute, affable guy who says "Hey! We both love God! Let's get married and go somewhere really hot!" Despite the cuteness of it's actor, this St. John Rivers did not answer for me.

And what the hell is up with that hair?!?!

I had some other minor issues, Gemma Jones is great but she seemed a little more abrupt than Mrs. Fairfax is usually portrayed, and Blance Ingram was kind of Fug. I also thought Thornfield Hall was more bright and cheerful than usual. I do have to applaud them for the great job they did with Bertha, from her mattress-lined room to how large she seemed (she was a large woman in the book).

If you are a Jane Eyre enthusiast like I am, it's certainly worth a watch, if only to laugh at the line "Mrs. Faifax got a letter. Sophie got a letter. Even Pilot got a letter!"

[Edit] Has anyone gotten a chance to read This yet? If you have, what did you think?

Cleaning up the Camera...

2010-04-14T15:54:00.003-04:00

Just some photos I took a good while back...

More after das wechseln...

Tiny Pemmin, the Easter Cat

Back in January, the longer, browner hair. Note the teeny cat behind my shoulder.

Fat Cat Corner!

One of the beautiful 'Serenity' Travel Posters Brian got me for Xmas

Entryway Bookshelf I scored for $10 and my old Cameras and Eyeball collage

Wordy Box

Easter Baskets for the Girls

Current Hair Color

North and South and OMG my knees don't work!

2010-04-13T22:56:00.001-04:00

So I had never seen North & South, nor read the book by Elizabeth Gaskell, but It was on my "Amazon Recommends" list and so I put it in my Netflix queue and forgot all about it. And then I started frequenting over here and got curious as to who this Richard Armitage guy is I kept reading so much about, so I finally got around to watching North & South.

Oh. My. God. Why have I never seen this? I've seen several versions of like, every Jane Austen adaptation and a small Army of Jane Eyres and this is one of the better shows I've ever seen in terms of story, production value, superior acting, and pure unrelenting hotness. RA can do more with a well-aimed glance that the majority of actors can do with some of the best dialog to be had. I was swooning for hours after watching this, and I'm afraid all of my friends on Stumbleupon were probably ready to delete me by the end of the day.

Now that I've gotten most of my fangirl squeals out of the way, I can talk about the movie. And only the movie, when I read the book I'll probably have more or otherwise to say.

Margaret Hale (Daniela Denby-Ashe) is a character I definitely like and relate to, she's smart and witty (though not quite as witty as Elizabeth Bennett) and she's kind and understanding (though not quite as understanding as Jane Eyre). It's her flaws that make me like her even more, from one stubborn girl to another...I salute you. But what I love about Margaret is how really terrible crap just keeps getting piled on her, heap after heap and she keeps her back straight and takes it for the sake of those that depend on her. She doesn't apologize for the things she has to do...though she does try to make people, sometimes unsuccessfully, understand. And girlfriend is Courageous! She jumps on a man to save him from an angry mob, that takes some serious backbone (especially after watching Gangs of New York, where I learned to be truly afraid of Angry Mobs).

The other main character, Mr. John Thornton (RA) is a born survivor, smart, fiercely temperamental but also truly tender. I know most people might say his angry outbursts or scathing criticisms would be his biggest flaw, but I would say it's being a total Mama's Boy.

There are some misunderstandings and a lot of the story is dedicated to the struggle between union and industry during the industrial revolution. I love that it was more than just a love story. There is a lot of commentary on Society, Class and Gender, and Margaret and Thornton are both in the unique position of having lived both well-off (or at least comfortable) and poor at various points in their lives.

I also enjoyed that so much of the movie talked about Cotton, and where I'm from in South Carolina it's all cotton, all the time. Stuff is NASTAY.

In any case, here is a pretty good fan-made trailer that I sent everyone with an internet connection along with the message "EEEEEEE!" So do yourself and me a favor and give it a go, will you?

Remembrance of the Past*

2010-04-11T20:46:00.001-04:00

*I stayed up like all night reading this book and am so tired that I didn't notice at first that I typed "Remembrance of the Spats". Seems kind of redundant, no? You would definitely remember If you saw someone wearing Spats.

What I have to say about this book will be brief as I am super tired and want nothing more than to be eating a cheeseburger in bed. Possibly a milkshake too.

I'd like to start by talking about the first half of this book. It's a "What If" P&P retelling, with a coda and some extras thrown in. Two months after his first disaster of a proposal, Darcy, Col. Fitzwilliam and Georgiana bump in to Lizzie and Mrs. Gardiner in Hyde Park. This would be about a month before Elizabeth and the Gardiners go on their tour of the Peak District. It's a clever scenairo, and is very well done. I was so in love with this story and the writing and was already wondering how I could have found two excellent fan-based P&P books back to back. I began to like it so much that I started thinking of it as "Alternate Universe Pride & Prejudice", which goes to show how much of a nerd I am, and that I probably watch too much Fringe, but whatever...Joshua Jackson is hot now so it's all good.

In the first chapter, we can already see that Mr. D has forgiven Lizzie and is trying to soften her opinion of him. Her reaction goes along swimmingly with the original book, though there is a bit of a monkey wrench in the form of a new character, Lady Cassandra. She's a close personal friend of both Mr. and Miss D and Elizabeth finds herself confused and even mortified when she realizes that she's jealous of Cassandra. I have to say, I'm usually not overly thrilled with new characters, but I did rather like this one. She's sort of a younger, hotter, funnier Lady Catherine. There is also a new character by way of a villain, and it's not Wickham! (Though that guy is pretty much the same) We also get glimpses into the narratives of some of the characters that are always on the sidelines in P&P. There is a good deal of time spent of Colonel Fitzwilliam (who I am now officially labeling a Dreamboat), and some of the story we get through the eyes of Bingley, Caroline, Mr. Bennett and even Jane! I also have to note that this is the least annoying version of Georgiana I've read since the original. A lot of these books make her overly sweet or crying every 2 seconds (though she does cry more than once in this book I let it go because she's SIXTEEN).

After a fortnight of bumping in to each other at the theater and making calls between Grosvenor and Gracechurch Streets, Darcy invites the Gardiners (but mostly Elizabeth) to visit Pemberly during their stay in Derbyshire. Some serious wooing takes place at Pemberly, and Elizabeth and Darcy find themselves in one awkward situation after another. And by Awkward, I mean "hot". A lot of small bits and pieces get moved around but the story flows so well I honestly never minded. We go through the whole Wickham/Lydia debacle, but this time Lady Cassandra and Col. Fitzwillaim lend a hand as well, the former scaring the crap out of Wickham and making me laugh with delight. After the return to Longbourn and a very awkward conversation with Mr. Bennett (who is far more observant that Darcy ever gave him credit for) everything seems peachy for (almost) everyone involved.

And Then...

When I read these books, and the second proposal and/or wedding happens only in the middle, I've learned to be seriously skeptical at what else the author has to offer. No one of course can match Austen's wit or style, and a lot of the books seem to suffer from the lack of source material. I won't say that's what happened in the second half of this book, it was still a compelling read and a good story, it just became a completely different story. It became a total Romance Novel.

For one, it had "the Sex", and that wasn't too badly done. In fact the first instance of "the sex" in this book was actually pretty steamy , and it wasn't Lizzie & Darcy, though there was plenty enough of that later. My philosophy when it comes to Sex with these P&P books is "less is more", and this book just suddenly became a bodice-ripper, albeit a very entertaining one. I really think the author should have split this in to two volumes, or two completely separate books. There was more villain action, another love story besides the Darcys, and some frustrating moments where I was ready for the pace of the story to pick up a bit. The very last chapter was very sweet and rewarding and should have capped off the first half of the book and left out the rest (or consigned the rest to a separate book). If it had, it would have gotten 9 & 1/2 or even 10 out of 10 stars, but as it is it sits at a strong 8.

One more thing, and this is just a peeve I have....whenever the subject of Sex would come up between ANY of the characters, they all referred to it as "...you know." At first it was cute. But after a while I was just wishing she had slipped in a mention of "dirty monkey sex", just to liven things up a bit.

Remembrance of the Past by Lory Lillian.

My Top 10 TV Tearjerkers

2010-04-10T14:05:00.003-04:00

It occoured to me when watching this past week's episode of Lost, the room "got a bit dusty" as it usually does with Desmond episodes. I really thought about the television moments that have made me openly weep, and because I love inflicting on others, I thought I'd provide a list...

10. Sid's Back and She's Pissed - Alias
Imagine waking up in Hong Kong, with no idea as to how you got there, only to discover that you've been missing for two years, your Daddy is in Federal Prison and the man you love is now married to someone else. That's gotta hurt! Sid let's Vaughn have it in a way that makes you feel like you've been punched in the gut. And when she finally lets it all out with "You want to know how I am? I am Horrible! I am ripped apart!" my waterworks start.

9. 'I Will Always Love You' - Gilmore Girls
This little gem was from the Gilmore Girls finale, where Lorelai starts singing Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You" to her Daughter Rory, but then Luke walks in and after some very emotional pauses the meaning changes entirely. It's a very sweet moment. Her little shrug mid-song as she looks at Luke just gets me every time!

8. A Hole in the World - Angel
Oh Fred. You were sort of annoying, then sort of endearing, then we really loved you, and then you died only to become the no less awesome, time-bending Illyria. Between her death throes and Wesley's desperation, this is a moment so sad and so touching, It makes me want to go to bed for about a week.

7. Heart - Supernatural
I'm thinking now that it's a rule for this show that the characters are never, ever allowed to be happy. Especially not when it comes to Love. Poor Sam has just found a woman he could love in Madison, except for the teensy problem of her being a werewolf. Sam and Dean race to find a way to save her, but alas, as it is Supernatural such is not to be had, and Madison asks Sam to take her out of the picture before she can hurt anyone else.

6. Ellen Tigh drinks the Kool-Aid - Battlestar Galactica
Well, finding a video clip with this one scene is impossible (or rather was taking too long) so here is the 'What the Frak' video which has the aforementioned clip in it. As they say..."Very Sad".

5. Gemma's Confession - Sons of Anarchy
This entire episode was something of a masterpiece. All season there had been this slow tension building, and just when everything was about to explode, Gemma the Matriarch steps forward with the painful confession of being brutally attacked, knowing that this is the only thing that can bring her family back and keep them together. Katey Sagal is one of the most incredible actresses I've ever seen, and she plays that scene so quietly and so understated that Jax and Clay's reactions, more than her confession, moves me to tears.

4. The Body - Buffy the Vampire Slayer
This episode is truly set apart from all others Buffy eps, for it's stark look at the death of a parent. Buffy comes home to find her mother dead of a Brain hemorrhage, and even though the first half hour of this episode is so difficult to watch, it's Anya's speech that makes it Brutal. I couldn't find a clip without some crappy song playing over the actors so I'll just paste the quote:

Anya: But I don't understand! I don't understand how this all happens. How we go through this. I mean I knew her and then she's , .. there's just a body and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore! It's stupid. It's mortal and stupid. And Xander's crying and not talking and I was having fruit punch and I thought well Joyce will never have anymore fruit punch ever, and she'll never have eggs or yawn or brush her hair, not ever and no one will explain to me why..

3. The Final Montage - Six Feet Under
The last part of this wonderful, beautiful mess of a show gave us a glimpse into the future. After five years of watching a stranger die at the beginning of each episode, we got to see how the end comes (as it must come for all of us) to the Fishers and their circle of friends and family. It begins with Claire, truly beginning her life at 22 years old, and ends with her lying in bed at 108. But it's really the moment when David sees Keith again that really gets me going. I know it's kind of long, but it so worth it! And damn if watching this clip doesn't make me miss the hell out of Ruth Fisher.

2. Godric Meets the Sun - True Blood
I had a really tough time trying to decide between the previous video and this one as #2, but in the end this one won out. Between Eric's emotional breakdown and Sookie's line "I'm afraid for you" my eyes didn't stand a chance!

1. The Constant - Lost

You would have to be made of stone to not cry at the beautiful phone call between Desmond and his true love Penny. It's a matter of life and death, and no less moving. Unfortunately, I can't find any embed code so Here is the link. Grab your tissues and enjoy this display of the purest, truest love.

Fitzwilliam Darcy, Gentleman.

2010-04-07T22:55:00.001-04:00

Wearer of fine waistcoats and neckcloths, rider of cranky horses, trainer of adorable doggies, war story enthusiast, devoted brother and friend. Pamela Aidan's version of Fitzwilliam Darcy is all these things, along with the things we already knew. Darcy is a self-imposed outsider, according to his BFF Bingley "determined to be displeased with the world and everyone in it." Or is he? Maybe he's just a man who never knew himself, as it were.

My project has been to read as many of these P&P retellings (not sequals) as possible. And while some of them have been clever and engaging (and some have been insipid and enraging) these are the first ones I have read that I can honestly say "I love it!". And Love it I do. Aidan's writing is beautiful and engaging, she made Darcy come alive as he never has in any other fan-penned book.

Aidan's first volume of the Darcy trilogy, An Assembly Such as This introduces us to our cast of players and goes as far as London, just after The Bingleys and Darcy have left Netherfield. There are a few new characters, such as Darcy's Shakespeare-quoting Valet Fletcher and his old University friend Lord Dyfed 'Dy' Brougham. Rather than retract from the original story, I found that we get a larger picture on the rules of Society, Caste and Class than we did in Pride & Prejudice. There are also some cameos in the book from Lady Caroline Lamb, Lord Byron (very briefly) and a hilarious run-in with Beau Brummell*. (See above, Re: Neckcloths)

The characters shine with Aidan's retelling. Here Charles Bingley has little patience for his sisters' jealous gossip as well as a quick sense of humor, and he often makes his good friend Darcy the butt of his jokes. Bingley, Fletcher and Dy provide most of the humor in this book, though I was surprised to find myself laughing at Darcy himself from time to time.

As he begins to realize his attraction to Elizabeth, his painful efforts at trying to win her favor are so awkward and so opposite of what we know Elizabeth sees that it becomes (as Fletcher dubs it) "A Comedy of Errors". Darcy is constantly criticizing himself, and so many of his inner dialogues being with "Idoit!" that I can't help but feel for the poor guy. We learn though the book of how painful the loss of his Father was, and that his aloofness is admittedly a "suit of armor" he wears to protect himself from feeling that pain again. And this works for him, though it's not until he begins getting to know Elizabeth that he realizes that not only has he not felt pain since his father's death, he's also been completely devoid of happiness as well. Darcy is calm seas on the outside, a raging storm of emotions on the inside.

With nothing but cold regard for the ladies of Society who would ultimately be more 'suitable' in his eyes, Darcy seems to become more awake and alive in Elizabeth's presence than he ever has been in his life. He obviously hates the weakness, but can't seem to help himself. We get all the lovely, often painful parts of real true first love. One of my favorite parts of the book is his internal debate over what makes a better wife, one who is "accomplished", or one who is "True and pure and lovely".

In all honesty, what better prerequisites were there for the woman one spent one's life with? His memory harkened back to Miss Bingley's long list of talents for the accomplished woman and his added requirement that she be well read. Would the embodiment of that list offer a better surety of his future happiness than a woman who was true, pure, and lovely?

With that thought to chew on, the book ends with Darcy vowing to himself to put Elizabeth behind him, fat lot of good it will do him!

I'll probably only touch on book 2 since it had the least to do with the events in P&P before plowing on to book 3, and since the bulk of the story happens there it'll probably take a while.

In the meantime, please feel free to admire my new banner.

*A Wiki search revealed that there was a 2006 BBC production called "Beau Brummell: This Charming Man" starring the oft-mentioned but no less deserving James Purefoy! Sweet Victory!

Oh THANK YOU, BBC!!!

The Peep Allegory

2010-04-05T09:55:00.003-04:00

Tomorrow, I will have lots to say because doubtless by then I will have finished Pamela Aidan's Darcy Trilogy (Preliminary thoughts? Love it!) but for now please do what is best for you and click the below link.

Later tater!

The Most Amazing Easter Story. Ever!

Books I Can't Live Without: The Changeover

2010-04-02T22:23:00.002-04:00

I have no hope of any current young adult fiction authors reading this, alas. If they did I would tell them to sit up, pay attention and take note. I'm talking about a piece of genius in their genre.

I have read a lot of YA fiction recently (see my goodreads list if you don't believe me) and while it's entertaining, it very seldom has any resonance or meaning. Not so with The Changeover: A Supernatural Romance. I will come right out and say that the only issue I've ever had with this book is that the title might lead people to believe the book is more frilly and superfluous than it actually is.

I came across this gem when I was about 14 or 15, right around the same age as our protagonist, Laura Chant. Rather than trying to sum up the whole plot, I'll let the back of the book do that for me...

"One Morning, Laura Chant wakes with the knowledge that something terrible is about to happen.
Laura has belt this way before, for she has the ability to see and sense things that other people can'. But this time the worst happens: Laura's little brother Jacko becomes the victim of a creature who wants to destroy him. The only way Laura can save Jacko is to join forces with her mysterious classmate Sorensen Carlisle, who is able to help her "change over" and use her supernatural powers to their fullest. Together, will they have enough power to confront the dark forces that loom over them?"

Laura has a lot going on in her life. She and her little brother have been estranged from their father for years, their mother makes little money and they always seem to be broke, and Laura is beginning to become self-aware in the way that only developing teenage girls are. She recognizes these natural changes for their strangeness and power, and at the same time is puzzled by them. What teenage girl has NOT felt that way? Even better, Sorensen or "Sorry" as they call him, is too becoming aware of her body in a way that is totally natural for teenage boys. Stephanie Meyer really messed up YA fiction by making it so damned chaste. This book is very frank about sexual attraction. One such exchange goes...

"So take a deep breath, Chant. You're no worse off and you might be better off...and at least you're not quite on your own with it anymore."
This was true. Laura did take a deep breath and realized as she did that Sorry was not watching her face, but the rise and fall of the breath under her old pajama jacket. He sighed himself, met her eyes, and gave her a smile both deprecating and conciliatory. "You did invite me in," he pointed out, "even though you knew I was a mixed blessing."

You never catch Edward Cullen (or even Jacob!) staring at Bella's boobs, and I think the book suffers for it!

Sorry is not the typical love interest. He's a bit lost, loves romance novels (for "research") and drives a Vespa. His efforts to win Laura are so confused and at the same time earnest, we know he's in love with her before he realizes it himself.

I've read a lot of books, I was reading Pet Cemetary and IT before I was 12 and I will tell you that there has seldom been a character as creepy as Carmody Braque. When I read the young adult fiction now and see their ideas of bad guys I have to laugh. They have no faith in their audience! In most cases, the bad guy turns out to be another Hot Guy with Strange Specialness just like the Hero. The girl in the story will either get beat up a little or will cower in a corner while someone else rescues her. "Stop fighting! I'm FRAIL!"

Margaret Mahy was not afraid to deliver a good villain, though he's absent for a good part of the book. Nor was she afraid to deliver a good Hero. In this case, Laura is more the hero than Sorry. Girlfriend is not afraid to get the job done!

But you don't have to totally take my word for it, check out the reader reviews at Amazon.com.

Hornfield Hall...get it? Get it?

2010-03-29T11:41:00.004-04:00

As promised, I want to say a few words about this book. I discovered after reading it that this was yet another book that began it's life as Fanfic and ended up getting published as part of a trilogy. I had little hints here and there but for the most part it was written fairly well that it didn't bother me.

The part I feel like the writer got right was Rochester's self-loathing and internal struggle. Part of the appeal of this character has always been his dark, thoughtful, somewhat obsessive nature. And for the first part of the book it goes along swimmingly with the original text. Our hero is brooding, haunted by his past and despairing for his future. The first few chapters were so well written I was ready to sit down and call this one of the best books ever. I thought the fact that he was immediately attracted to Jane was a little bit of a break from the text, but was willing to go along with it. UNTIL...

**spoiler alert**

There is a superfluous scene in which he spies on Jane playing piano and writing a song about him, and they sort of make out by the fire. Call it "intense hugging". I was a bit taken aback and think I said "Okaaaaaay" before reading on. Then comes the night when she saves him from the fire. Rather than going back to her room like a good Victorian governess would, they MAKE OUT! And the making out and "close calls" continue throughout the book. Don't get me wrong, they aren't quite as smutty as they could be, but at the same time...no! The great thing about Jane Eyre is that Jane does the right thing, the hard thing, in spite of her passionate nature. Our Jane would never be making out on a bearskin rug with her Employer if she happens to love him or not!

Then comes the confusing, and I think a tad unnecessary derivations from the time line and original plot of Jane Eyre. When Mason shows up at the Thornfield house party, Jane is already gone to Gateshead Hall. Instead of finding St. John, Mary & Diana Rivers by providence, Jane is introduced to them through a lawyer. There are a lot of instances like this where I finally came to peace with the notion that this book was not for the Jane Eyre purist (or even the diehard fan).

I did enjoy Mr. Rochester's sensual side, his darkly romantic musings, and his heart-to-heart conversations with his good friend Eshton. I also was more interested in the book's take on Bertha, showing her and Edward as both being victims of their father's greed. The Squee noted that there was a definite nod to Wide Sargasso Sea in this book, and I agree as far as the portrayal of Bertha goes there was. Also shown in a different light is Blanche Ingram. Instead of being a puppet for Rochester to inspire Jealousy, she is a coldly calculating woman with a total absence of heart or conscience. And her Dad is super creepy.

The book is peppered with descriptions of food, and at one point Rochester and Eshton are comparing women to food and one of them remarks "Now I'm Hungry". I had to laugh out loud at that. They eat, smoke, and Drink (capital 'd' because that's how much they drink) in such excess I felt like I had a hangover just from reading about it.

Would I recommend this book? Sure, if you can look at it as an alternative story from the original. It's definitely sexy, and I probably will read the next 2 books because even a slightly different Rochester is still pretty hot.

That's what she said?

2010-03-29T00:55:00.002-04:00

Am tired from a busy day of food, shopping and driving so this won't be a very long post. I did want to mention (and I will go in to further detail on this later - maybe tomorrow) that I just finished reading what I now realize is book one of a trilogy: Rochester: A Novel Inspired by Charlotte Bronte's "Jane Eyre" by J. L. Niemann. It's not as heinous as a lot of the Darcy books I've read lately (the two 'Diaries' were really the best out of the bunch, I am currently compiling a list of the worst offenders) all I'm going to say for now is that he was actually living at Hornfield.

Oh an also...my future sister-in-law just started blogging her little heart out. She is hilarious and wry and all things delightful, see for yourself here.

Robin Hood, my Arse...

2010-03-24T21:03:00.004-04:00

Can I just come right out and say how much I hate the idea of Russell Crowe playing Robin Hood? To me, Robin Hood should be mature, but not above 40. (As I'm sure at that time 40 was probably considered pretty well aged) He should also not be all doughy. UGH. This is not just my personal dislike for R.C. here, I really am not in love with his acting either. And why can't they get an English guy to play him?

My picks are...

1. James Purefoy

I realize that James is probably the same approximate age as Russell Crowe, but what a difference! He has a roguish charm that would definitely suit the role.

2. Matthew Macfadyn

I know that Mr. Macfadyn will be playing the Sheriff of Nottingham, who the movie was suppossed to be about originally. Too bad we will not be getting THAT movie.

3. Henry Cavill

This guy deserves a feature role! Not only is he the hottest and most compelling character on The Tudors (sorry, Jonathan Rhys-Meyers) but he was beaten out of playing not one but two roles by Robert Pattison. Henry auditioned for the role of Cedric Diggory for Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and Stephanie Meyer pretty much wrote the character of Edward Cullen with Henry in mind, saying "The only actor I've ever seen who I think could come close to pulling off Edward Cullen is....(drumroll)...Henry Cavill". But by the time they were able to cast the movie, Pattison looked closer to Edward Cullen's 17 than Cavill. O, what might have been! Imagine a world without RPatz mania...seems peaceful, no?

4. Jeremy Northam

Loved him in Emma. Loved him even more in Gosford Park and Possession. Played Sir Thomas Moore on The Tudors. It's time to give this man a weapon.

5. Kevin McKidd

I realize I'm contradicting myself, Kevin McKidd is not English but Scots. However, anyone who has seen Rome knows he can put on an English accent no problem. He's mature but still has a boyish charm that I find appealing. Not only that but the guy is a hell of an actor (way better than R.C., IMO) and can shoot daggers with his eyes better than anyone I've ever seen.

What do you guys think? Am I being too harsh on Mr. Crowe or are you as disturbed as I am? Who would YOU see as Robin Hood?

I want to go to there...

2010-03-23T19:59:00.000-04:00

Found these over at Mental Floss today.

In honor of the warmer weather, here are more T-shirts that want me to wear them...

From Cafepress.

From Threadless.

Married to the Sea T-shirts available from Sharing Machine. Married to the Sea is, by the way, one of the most hilarious sites you will ever want to waste time at, I promise.

Am currently halfway through Amanda Grange's Colonel Brandon's Diary. More thoughts on that later.

The Two Diaries of Darcy

2010-03-21T02:45:00.001-04:00

After a good six months of reading (almost exclusively) Young Adult Fiction, I decided a few weeks ago that I would plunge back into the classics, and I did so with a vengeance. I finished with Pride & Prejudice, and then decided to listen to my buddies at Amazon.com and try some of the novels that were P&P retold from Darcy's point of view. I decided to make an experiment out of it and read them back-to-back after glossing over P&P one more time.

The first one was Mr. Darcy's Diary by Amanda Grange. I liked this one, though at times thought it was kind of 'Darcy for Dummies'. More of a Romance than P&P, but was nonetheless an enjoyable read. I think I might prefer this version of our hero to the other book (though not to the original). At first it started off a bit dull, but I quickly found myself enjoying the narrative, particularly his mixed delight and wariness at Lizzy's sharp wit and laughing manners. Amanda Grange knows her audience, and gives them exactly what they want. She never pretends to be Austen, but is pretty adept nonetheless. One of the things I liked best was the few pages which chronicle events that happened after the wedding, up to the Darcy's first Christmas. It flowed seamlessly from the previous narrative, and seemed like it could have been a feasible end even for Jane Austen. It's not as meaningful or layered as P&P, but definitely sweet and may cause you to get a case of the warm fuzzies. My largest complaint: In a letter to his friend Darcy, Bingley calls Jane "an adorable angel". That's a little blech-worthy, even for Mister Bingley.

The second book was The Private Diary of Mr. Darcy by Maya Slater. Now this was a clever concept, a diary found in a hidden drawer of a desk two hundred years from the time it was written by none other than our Mr. Darcy (the "afterword" claims that it was written by the man they believed Austen based the character on). This book was a rich, often disturbing, and sometimes dry look at the life of a Regency-Era gentleman. He engages in fisticuffs, he fences, he goes to bordellos and dallies with housemaids, he talks war and politics (Napolean Bonaparte is referred to, amusingly, as 'Boney'). And of course, he and his good friend Charles Bingley hang out with none other than the infamous Lord Byron, rock star of his day. There are so many things I disliked about the portrayal of Darcy in this book, and so many things I liked about it at the same time. In the beginning he is just as he was first portrayed in P&P...stiff, arrogant, rude. Not to mention a man with a healthy appetite for the ladies. Though at first the only ladies he is interested in are the prostitutes and the maids, he seems to show no interest in the ladies of society (such as the ever-scheming Caroline Bingley, whose overtures have never been more pathetic as they are portrayed here). Unlike Mr. Darcy's Diary, this version of Darcy at first seems more disturbed than delighted by Elizabeth, and the attraction (though not the admiration) is almost immediate. He makes a valiant attempt at denying it, but can't fool us or himself. On her last day at Netherfield attending to Jane, Darcy prides himself on having ignored Elizabeth for the entire day, but still notes that while he ignored her for his book, "she pricked herself while sewing, and lifted her finger to her lips". He thinks he's doing such a good job of ignoring her, but by this he gives the game away.

Much of the parts that take place between the Netherfield Ball and Darcy's visit to Rosings have only brief mentions of "E", and is much more occupied with keeping a sunken, heartbroken Bingley from despair (and from the clutches of a crafty courtesan) and trying to help frail Georgiana recover from a much more violent version of events that took place between herself and the perfidious Mister Wickham. As to the character of Georgiana, I could have done without so much of her. I felt that she was written very contrary to what Austen portrayed, a shy sweet girl becomes a willful, sometimes bratty kid sister. Charles Bingley, however, has never been more interesting than this bitter, heartbroken version. I found myself liking his character at times more than Darcy's!

The Meat of the story takes places in describing the events from Darcy and *Col. Fitzwilliam's arrival at Rosings to months later when he stumbles across Elizabeth taking in the view at Pemberly. To myself, the best part of the book is his self-delusion that Elizabeth Bennett is nothing more than a pretty face, to the realization that he can't stay away from her and is in the middle of a full-blown obsession. His desperation as he observes her, the constant need to be near her to see her is in fact an overwhelming difference from the former, slightly disturbed and put-out regard he had for Elizabeth. Darcy describes himself as desperate and half-crazed. And the events that take place after her resounding rejection show our hero in such a state of despair, anger, and self-loathing that we can't help but feel for him. All in all I would have been happy if they had omitted the debauchery provided to them by Byron, I felt that the events that took place at Byron's estate dragged on and lost all of their shock value. Of course, as he must, our Hero emerges "properly humbled" and hopefully forever faithful to his Elizabeth. I can't say I loved this book in context with P&P, but as a stand-alone story it was a solid, entertaining read. But proceed with caution, if you do not want your image of the Mr. Darcy in anyway tarnished, than this is not the book for you.

*One thing I found of interest was in both of these books, Col. Fitzwilliam had more than a passing fancy for Elizabeth. In fact both versions lamented to Darcy that she was "the perfect woman but for want of fortune" and both versions seemed to consider actually offering to her during the visit at Rosings, giving both versions of Darcy a "close call" that they did not, she undoubtedly would have accepted.

Poor and Plain, Obscure and Little

2010-03-08T18:04:00.001-05:00

I just finished re-watching the 2006 BBC version of Jane Eyre and was once again blown away by how perfectly it captures the book. And I would know, as a nerdy teenager I carried my battered, dog-eared copy everywhere. I read it and re-read it until I could dream at night about being in Thornfield Hall. If you have never read it, here is an excellent reader review that touches on Jane's Feminism and Rochester as the ultimate romantic hero. (He definitely had my vote!)

So, in honor of that, I briefly considered listing my favorite Edwards from Literature, but all I could come up with was Rochester, Ferrars, and (recluctantly) Cullen. Instead, I'd like to stick with Jane Eyre and list my top 5 favorite movie versions of Charlotte Bronte's classic. And before you comment, I have yet to see any of the versions from Mexico, Hong Kong, India, or the 1997 one with Ciaran Hinds and Samantha Morton. Not to say I won't get around to it.

5. 1996. Directed by Franco Zeffirelli.

Starring a practically unknown at the time Charlotte Gainsbourg as Jane, a definitely phoning-it-in William Hurt as Rochester, and a teeny Anna Paquin as young Jane.

I liked it when it first came out (in my senior year of high school and at the peak of my Bronte-mania), in fact I had an enormous version of the movie poster on my wall. This movie would have been so much better if not for William Hurt. He dosen't have the edge or the fire that Rochester has. He's Blandy McBlanderson. And I know I'm just nitpicking here, but dammit...Rochester is not a blond guy. Gainsbourg is okay, but to be honest when I went back and rewatched some of the clips she comes off as dry as toast. I'm not saying it's not worth a watch, Elle McPherson makes a cameo as Blanche Ingram, though she spends her scenes looking confused as to what she is doing there. So was I! All in all it's a very decent effort, though it leaves out a lot of the book (which is usually my biggest complaint).

4. 1970. Directed by Delbert Mann.

I don't have much to say about this version other than I've seen it, sorta. I watched it when I was sick with Mono, Thrush, and a whole bunch of other disgusting stuff. I had a 104 degree fever at the time and can't remember anything about it other than the colors were really, really weird (though that was probably just the fever) and the music was very eerie. My future mother-in-law loves it though. I'm not sure if it's still her favorite since the BBC version, if not it's a definite second.

3.1983.. Directed by
Julian Amyes.

This is the one I refer to as "the one with Timothy Dalton". It's good, if a bit (really) sound-stagey. Dalton turns in a solid performance (even if at times he flourishes his words a bit too much. ACTING!). Zelah Clarke plays Jane so understated she's practically on mute through most of the film, with exception of the scene when Rochester proposes. It's been a while since I've seen this version, but I remember watching that scene and thinking "She's Fiesty! Where has she been this whole time?"

2.1944. Directed by Robert Stevenson.

This was the first film adaptation of the book I ever saw, and I guess it's stuck with me quite a bit over the years. Starring Orson Welles, Joan Fontaine (who I always adored), and a very young Elizabeth Taylor as the (spoiler!) doomed Helen Burns. Orson Welles, not surprisingly, was brilliant at capturing Rochester's restless, cynical, and somewhat obsessive side. I thought (and still believe) that Joan Fontaine was way too gorgeous to have ever played a character who is by and large known as plain, but her acting is up to the challenge and she plays the part well. The sets are stark and spooky, and the recreation of the Yorkshire Moors is something to see. This is a dark and beautiful version, even if it is a bit choppy and cut short in places.

1.2006. Directed by Susanna White.

I really can't stop singing the praises of this one. The music is beautiful, the sets are gorgeous, the costuming perfect, the acting superb.
I do have to say (and give credit to the director & actors) this version was quite a bit sexier than the very chaste book. Toby Stephens' Rochester practically smolders his way through the first half of the film. And Ruth Wilson has done the best job of any of her predecessors with Jane's independence, virtue and passion. Both actors are quite a bit hotter than the characters they are playing, but you will never hear me phrase that as a complaint. And MAJOR points for this being the only version that gets the Moor House part of the story right! St. John Rivers is as cool and hard-nosed as he was in the book, yet I found myself liking his character in the movie more than on the page. And I have to give props to the casting director for casting Claudia Coulter as Bertha Mason. If you have seen Wide Sargasso Sea*, (a prequel to Jane Eyre about young Edward Rochester's exploits in Jamaica) you will know that Coulter is almost a dead ringer for Karina Lombard, who plays the Bertha in Sea.

*I just looked up the IMdb page for Wide Sargasso Sea and saw that Rochester is played in that movie by Nathaniel Parker, who I had the hots for as the Dunstan Thorn, a.k.a. the Dad in Stardust. That explains it, I knew I'd seen him nekkid before.

In any case, I've added my favorite clips below. The first one is the scene that takes place after Jane saves Mr. Rochester from the fire that was set in his room. This scene makes me SWOON.

A Beautiful Solution

2010-03-06T12:13:00.000-05:00

I love the Vivienne Westwood Union Jack Pillow, but could never justify paying $495 for one.

Enter Helkatdesign. I found myself loving these far more than the original, and they are a fraction of the cost. Here are a few of my favorites...

Handprinted rustic unionjack flag in muted brown and blue on a hessian cushion $42

Welsh Dragon $54. Which is like beloved little Teapot...

The whole shop is delightful, and she offers a discount if you want the cover only. Who could ask for more?

Found on Craigslist for under $100...

2010-03-05T19:03:00.003-05:00

Chrome Chairs. 2 for only $60!!!

Orange Vinyl Chair. This little baby is sweeeet. It's calling me...and it's only $45. I think it's love.

And then there is this little bit of gorgeous...for only $50.

Yay!

2010-02-13T10:48:00.003-05:00

Last semester BOBI had a big assignment in one of his computer programming classes. The assignment was to create something that would encourage people to walk. I suggested a sort of social network/meetup type site where people could recommend places to walk, best routes, places with good views or lots of hills, etc. I only say this because in case someone does end up creating this, I want to be able to say I thought of it first.

In any case, they did not use my idea but decided instead to do a demo* for an application for the New (at the time) Droid phone. I'm not 100% sure what the application is suppossed to do, but I think it's like a game in which Zombies are chasing you all over the campus and there are "safe points" that you have to walk to.

(*Please note that I am approximating the technical terms. Brian could tell it better but he's asleep after staying up all night playing Dante's Inferno.)

While they were working on this, Brian practically lived on campus. I would MAYBE see him for a few minutes in the morning, and he would be gone until sometimes 2:00 in the morning. The week before the project was due, he literally spent three days at school, sleeping on the couch in the ACM room. On day 3 he was too tired to even drive himself home. Finally, the project was finished. It seems that the Professor so admired their work, he told them to submit it to the CHI (Computer Human Interaction) Conference. This is a huge conference sponsored by Google, Microsoft and the National Science Foundation and being picked to show is kind of a huge deal.

AND THEY GOT PICKED!!!

So in April Brian and his other 2 team members will be heading down to Atlanta to show their project. Let's all give Brian and his hard work a round of Applause!

I will probably fly down to ATL (paying for myself of course)to see Brian's presentation and spend some time with my family while I'm there. I am so proud of him and so glad to know that all those long days & nights have finally paid off! Great work Baby!

New On My Etsy Shop...

2010-01-11T22:57:00.004-05:00

Sorry for the Blurriness of some of these photos, my camera is not what anyone would call "new" or "adequate". I call these little babies 'Treasure Boxes'...what do you guys think?

Home Again, Home Again

2009-10-02T09:33:00.002-04:00

I recently got back from spending 3 weeks down in SC, helping my friend Tara move into her gorgeous new house, of which I'm extremely jealous.

The bad news is that I left my laptop sitting on my parent's couch. And we seem to be in the middle of a dispute so no telling when I get it back.

I'm looking forward to going to Brunch on Sunday with the girls, to celebrate Molly's new promotion!

If you are ever in St. Paul, Dixie's on Grand has an amazing champagne brunch! I'll let them slide for trying to pass off their food as "southern" (it isn't) in favor of unlimited Mimosas and all-you-can-eat omletes!

Listiness

2009-07-23T21:36:00.002-04:00

Just browsing some of the stuff that's up on Today's Minneapolis Craigslist today, the only rule? Nothing over $100.

Check out these beauts...

Paint it Hot Pink!

I love this chair, it makes me think of my Aunt Betty. This would be lovely painted a glossy black or a bright white. $20!

I sort of love this bed frame as-is, though there are a ton of possibilities. And for $65, well worth it!

Now that is just cute.

It's only temporary, one hopes.

2009-07-22T20:41:00.003-04:00

This will temporarily be the look of this page that all 2 of you follow until Crystal has time to make me a new one, I wouldn't trust anyone else to get it just right.

In other news, I managed to score an iBook G4 for $145! It's not fancy, but just what I wanted. I knew all those nights spent exhausted and red-eyed going though Craigslist ads would pay off eventually!

So Wee!

Entryway Revamped

2009-07-22T19:56:00.002-04:00

Here is the cute little retro bookshelf Brian & I got at the same rummage shop where we came by the dresser. I decided to use it in my entryway rather than the great pile o' shoes I originally had. It was $10 and the cameras/transistor radio I picked up at various garage sales. How do we feel about arranging our books by color? There is something so counter intuitive, like using a smart thing in a shallow way, or judging a book by it's cover, I suppose. Despite that (or maybe because of it) I love it. What does everyone else think?

New Pretty Grown-Up'dness...

2009-07-19T22:57:00.004-04:00

Since being laid off last month I've tried to keep myself busy...helping the girls find cool decor for the new apt, re-reading The Twilight Saga, all 7 Harry Potter books and re-watching all 5 movies (just saw 6, loved it!) and occasionally looking for a job. One thing I've been wanting to do for a long (loooong) time was to repaint and redecorate my bedroom, which until last week were a shade of mottled aqua that was not soothing, did not remind one of tropical skies, but rather the walls in your elementary school. And the paint job was rather bad, aqua in a stripe on the ceiling. I have worked tirelessly for the past few weeks, and am pretty happy with the result, even BOBI is pleased. Click for yourself...

The walls I painted a vanilla ice cream beige, the camera makes it look a little more yellow than it really is. The bed is the Dalselv frame from Ikea. I bought 2 1/2 yards of 1" foam and a roll of quilters batting and stapled it to the head board. I then made the slipcover from Gunilla fabric, also Ikea. It looks a little boxy in this picture because I haven't actually sewed it yet, the fabric is just draped & pinned. I got tired!

The print I got from Etsy, from Hidenseek. Cannot recommend enough! Here is a closeup...

This one is called "Seduction".

I will never stop loving our Bedazzled Alarm Clock, courtesy of Smalls & Selg. The fan I got this weekend at a garage sale. $5.00. And it works. And I just ordered one on ebay the day before. For $12. Curses!

More Etsy art on Window-facing wall. This one 'We Grew Together' from The Paper Apartment. The small one is a postcard, called 'Lengthening'. I love them both!

Closer up. I re-purposed the pink mat, to rather nice effect I think.

Brian's new chest of drawers, circa 1930's. Just bought it yesterday, and it's absolutely beautiful. Hardly a scratch on it. And Bonus! There was a newspaper lining one of the drawers. September 4, 1941. Lots of talk about Vichy.

Top of Dresser. I love the little red bicycle. I like the mason jar, which you cannot tell is full o' pennies, and I like the french flashcard, but I think this is definitely a work in progress. Clutter happens! The picture is my Grandmother, Ola.

The Cube Shelf from CB2.

Cute, and you can change out your decor a lot with them, but what a bitch to level. They are still not completely even, but it's passable. Little red votives from our large Swedish friend. One day perhaps I'll get my big white armoire back from Tara and can stash my TV in it...but until then the TV stays unstylishly put.

I love trays. Love love love them. This one started it's life at Target, as a plate.
The bedside table is perfect. Perfect size, perfect colors, and free! Thanks to my good Friend Thorsten, who just moved back to Germany and is already missed.

I found this genuine Marimekko fabric at a garage sale a few months ago, pattern is "Unikko" Maija Isola. I haven't been able to find another Marimekko with the same color scheme online. It's dark blue flowers with orange centers and yellow stems. Has anyone else seen this? And do they think it will fetch a good price on ebay/Etsy? I am, after all, unemployed.

Any thoughts on the room? As I said, still a work in progress, but it's coming along nicely. Feedback is always appreciated!

Vampires, Steampunk.

2009-07-03T22:08:00.005-04:00

Would it be bad to say I'm enjoying being laid off, just a little bit?

I'm sure that wouldn't be the case if not for the fact that BOBI's sisters are moving into the upstairs apartment, I've been helping Sarah pick out some stuff second hand to Steampunk her new bedroom. Also tossing around the theme of "I got locked in an old British library" meets "Alice in Wonderland". Are there any simple craft ideas or cheap options out there for this? Comment your ideas.

Just got The Hunger Season 1 to watch, cause Vampires are so hot right now....Still, Daniel Craig? I'll take it. Speaking of vampires, why has no one cast Billy Corgan as one yet? I realize this gives Billy Corgan as many mentions on this blog as myself, BOBI and the cats combined, but really...

HE WANTS YOUR BLOOD.

And if we are going that far, why not go whole hog and also cast Trent Reznor a`la 'The Perfect Drug'?

VOLTURI!

That's all for now, Ta!

Do-Over!

2009-06-19T06:34:00.002-04:00

Need to give this old thang an overhaul.

It's 5:35 a.m. and I am very much NOT wanting to get ready for work, another round of company layoffs started yesterday and I'm not sure weather or not I will make it through this round.

Any thoughts on what to do in my possibly-upcoming spare time?

Grr, Blood, Purple.

2008-09-10T07:47:00.002-04:00

I not-so-solemnly swear I will try to update this thing more often.

A few bits:
-The wedding has been postponed for now. Brian and I are fine, just taking some more time before we tie the knot.

-I just discovered that the Limited does carry my size. All this time I would just breeze by it with a pained expression. Now I know the pained expression is not because the clothes are too small, but too expensive! What a relief!

-True Blood on HBO is awesome. Where can I learn to throw rusty chains up here, right?

-Purple is my new favorite color.

Sharing the Love

2008-03-30T08:19:00.002-04:00

Looks like Neil Gaiman has put up his most amazing piece of work to date up to read for free. American Gods is hands-down one of the best reads you could ever find, and here is the link to read it for free. Go there, now.

In other news, I thought I'd share a little non-wedding related list of everything I'm currently in love with.

#1 - Mrs. Meyers Clean Day Cleaning Products in Geranium

Okay, I've only ever used the dish soap, but it really cleans better than anything I've ever used and makes the whole house smell beautiful. I hear that the Rhubarb scent is also to die for. They even have stuff to make your pets squeaky clean! Order some or find a participating store at Mrs. Meyer's Clean Day.

#2 - All things Kashi

It started out with the chewy trail mix bars. Then I tried the cookies. Give me cranberries, almonds, and coconut and I'm a happy girl. I decided to try the Go Lean cereals, as when you are trying to drop pounds they say the first thing to do is up your leafy greens and your fiber & protein. Go Lean is loaded with both fiber and protein, however the standard variety takes a bit like those foam packing peanuts would if you poured milk on them. The Honey Almond Flax variety is very good, however.
Their website also has a 'Challenge Yourself' section. Check it out. And try the trail mix bars, yum.

#3 - Madonna

Blame it on the 'Confessions' remix, I'm in the process of going through her catalog and realizing how much I love (still love) so many of these songs. Remember Cherish? How about La Isla Bonita? Fun fact: the guy who sold Bobi his car was from San Pedro, the Isla she is referring to. A few more of my favorites are Live to Tell, Oh Father, and Take a Bow. Her ballads as close to pop perfection as you can get. Huge Love to Madonna.

#4 - Chelsea Lately on E!

I'm pretty sure Bobi has a big crush on Chelsea. But that's cool with me, I might have a crush on her myself. Funny is attractive! I don't always agree with her, especially not on the subject of Tori Spelling, but she never fails to crack us up.

#5 - Martha Stewart Crafts at Michaels

I imagine that If Martha, Hillary, and Oprah teamed up and decided to take over the world, we'd all be powerless to stop it. Goddammit Martha! I never realized how badly I wanted to make big paper pompoms until you started selling them at Michaels! Find projects here.

2008-03-23T10:12:00.002-04:00

It's been forever (or 3 months) between posts, I've got to get better at this.

Thought I'd post some photos of recent events...

My Customized Easter "baskets" for the Auron/Lien fam, filled with Japanese cider candies, chocolate coins, and calico bags of chocolate-covered peanut-butter filled pretzels. Yum!

These parasols I found in a Bridal salon in Roseville, they painstakingly added the silk flowers to each one. Something I'm considering for my bridesmaids.

The new kitten, Pemmin, with her favorite Toy. Poor Buddy.

One of the venues we looked at for the wedding reception. Wonder why it's called 'The Moose'?

A nice moment captured at Aunt Patty's New Years Eve celebration.

The most awesome-est Grooms Cake ever,per Bobi. Courtesy of The Offbeat Bride

This is the room where the reception is being held, only we are using round tables. It's the Greysolon Plaza ballroom in Duluth, and it's beyond gorgeous!

A view of the lobby, lit up for the holidays.

A view of Lake Superior just outside the ballroom. This was obviously a summer photo, so Imagine those trees being all red and orange.

From the lobby.

Sara's Bridesmaids dress. They are all different styles, only using the same color.

Molly's dress.

A few Announcements...

2008-01-18T06:34:00.000-05:00

Without uploading any photos (promise I'll do it later), her goes...

- Brian Graduated! He's now teaching Japanese to kids with learning disabilities and loving it.

- Brian & I had Christmas in Tennessee with my family! They love love love him, he loves them, it was excellent (and next time we're flying).

- We got a kitten! She's sweet and funny and scrappy, her name is Pemmin (Brian's idea, don't ask unless you want a diatribe on nerdiness)

- I turned 30! Which happens to feel a lot like 29.

And the most biggest news...Brian Proposed! We're getting married!

Blogger should foot the bill, cause this has got to be a first for them, right?

Chicken Bahg

2007-12-28T20:03:00.000-05:00

In the Deep South (aka 'The Lowcountry') you call it Chicken Bog. It's basically a few simple ingredients...chicken (duh), white rice, and some form of sausauge (usually kielbasa). It tastes about like it sounds...white. If you want extra flavor, you can add vinegar (WHITE vinegar!). I decided to revamp it a bit, here is what I came up with.

Stuff You Need

About 4 boneless, skinless chicken thighs, cut into strips. I like thighs because they don't get stringy like boneless skinless white meat does.

2 or 3 pieces of Andouille sausauge, casings removed. You can also use Chorizo, but I like Andouille for it's more subtle flavors.

One medium onion, diced.

One Green Bell Pepper, diced

One Red Bell Pepper, diced

2 Cloves Garlic, Minced (OR if you are like me and use the Garlic in a jar, 1 tsp)

One Can diced tomatoes, drained (You can substitute with a can of RoTel if you want to give it a little extra kick)

Half a small can (about 2 tbsp) Pineapple Chunks, drained.

Two Cups Chicken Broth

One cup long grain white rice

Salt and Pepper
One Teaspoon Cayanne Pepper

1/2 Teaspoon Parsley

Chopped Green Onion for topping

One teaspoon Vegetable Oil

Just a few of the ingredients I recommend.

To start, heat the teaspoon of oil over medium heat in a reasonably sized dutch oven or pot. Add the sausage and brown. Salt and Pepper your chicken and add to the pot until cooked through, about 8 minuites.

Chicken and Sausauge in a pot, obviously not done yet.

Once the chicken and sausage are cooked all the way through and show no pink spots, remove the meat and drain all but about one tsp of the drippings. Return to heat (reduced to medium low), add the onion and cook until soft, about 3 minuites. Add the Red & Green bell pepper and the garlic, cook another 2-3 minuites.

Add the pineapple, tomatoes, chicken broth, cayanne pepper and parsley and bring to a simmer. Stir in the rice and return to simmer. Lastly add the chicken and sausage in a single layer on top.

Getting There!

Cook for about 25 min, partially covered. Once it's done you can add the green onion (or your garnish of choice). The Tabasco Mild Green Jalapeno sauce is nothing short of awesome added to this dish.

Hope you like!

Hells Yeah!

Oh BLAHG!

2007-12-17T07:03:00.000-05:00

Oh Blog, you poor, ignored little bugger. I have been able to unstick myself from Battlestar Galactica reruns long enough to update you. I'm very ashamed of this neglect.

Well, little, sad, unread & ignored one...what's new with you? Oh right, nothing. What's new with me? Well! Here is the laundry list...

- We love living in St. Paul. Burnsville is lousy with soccer moms, minivans, and only one Olive Garden. I got a library card, and when the wind is not blowing cold ass air in our faces, we walk the three blocks over and browse books. It's fun.

- I finished my blanket made of T-shirts...Sorry this picture is so dark. It was fun to make.

- Brian is Graduating this week! Of course he's immediately going to attempt entering the PhD program of Asian Languages & Literature, (yes, you skip the postgrad and go right into PhD, but you do get a master's out of it anyway, I know...wierd). Anyway, I am very proud, so much so that I let him get an Xbox 360. I have since fallen in love with Guitar Hero. Dammit!

- My job is still...my job. Meh. But I will hopefully be enrolling in Online Classes at the Art Institutue of Minneapolis. We'll see.

- My mom came to visit! We didn't get into the first fight. Miracle.

I guess the biggest thing to mention is that two days after my last post, my dad got the liver he'd been waiting for for oh...seven years. I flew down to Duke courtesy of Aunt Betty and stayed there for 2 weeks while he recovered. It was actually pretty awesome. He was out of the hospital after five days, which is practically unheard of. We went to see Transformers less than a week after his surgery! The movie sucked, but being able to go to the movie was better than great.

I don't know why I always attempt lengthy blog posts when I have to get ready for work. Write another 5 minuites or shave my legs? Bah, it's winter. Nobody shaves their legs in winter, right?

In Soviet Russia...

2007-06-21T14:53:00.000-04:00

Hotdog Eats You!!!

Bringing Scully Back

2007-06-20T14:32:00.000-04:00

I love it when both of my bosses are out. Instead of doing real work I get caught up on my blogging. Just remember to delete those cookies!

No update yet on Dad's new Liver. As of today Duke's Transplant Clinic is saying "It could be any day now". So I'm sitting on a small mound of vacation time like a mad little squirrel sitting on her winter nuts....her winter stockpile of nuts. Speaking of nuts, I wish Angel & Firefly fans had had the organization and resources that Jericho fans did. They got their cancelled show back on the air, and all it took was 25 million pounds of Peanuts. Somewhere, Joss Whedon is weeping.

Thanks to a kind young woman I work with, I've been plowing my way through the first seven seasons of the X-files. I just finished Season 3, and aforementioned co-worker practically had to pry it straight out of my grip I liked it so much. Best episode ever? Jose Chung's 'From Outer Space'. Brilliant from start to finish.

I feel I would be remiss If I did not make a list of my favorite guest appearances, seasons 1-3:

1. Peter Boyle as the Suicidal Precog
2. Alex Trebek and Jesse Ventura as the Men In Black
3. B.D. Wong (from Law & Order SVU as the Charbroiled Chinatown Cop
4. Giovanni Ribisi as lightning boy
5. Jack Black as french-fried Friend of lightning boy
6. Seth Green as long-haired freaky people (need not apply)
7. Jewel Staite as girl who is kidnapped by Colin Mocherie look-alike
8. Michael J. Anderson as seriously short-fused (ha!) Hotel Manager
9. Guy who played Jenny Calender's Uncle on Buffy as sometimes-conjoined twin guy.
10. Lucy Liu as pointless sick girl. But still...Adorable!
11. Brad Dourif (who beautifully played Doc Cocharan on Deadwood as a psychic on Death Row.
12. Terry O'Quinn (Lost's Locke) as overbearing police guy
13. Lady who played Frazier Crane's Agent Bebe as Clone Lady, aka Eve 6. I guess I have Chris Carter to thank for inspiring Crappy Bands everywhere.

I'd also like to thank Mitch Pileggi's back for making a cameo in Season 3. Is there anyone who just oozes hotness like A.D. Skinner?
An additional shout-out goes to the episode where Scully FINALLY gets to drive. Brian, not being the biggest X-files fan, is back to playing World of Whorecraft, I mean Warcraft. I'm cool with it now, as long as it dosen't get so out of hand I have to take him on the Tyra show or anything. Did you see that episode? The husband left the hospital for 3 hours to play WoW while his WIFE WAS GIVING BIRTH TO THEIR CHILD. If ever a situation called for Tyra Banks, that was it. Personally, I think Blizzard Inc should not require payment of it's players. I think it should in fact be paying money to the player's significant others. Call it reimbursment for the medical bills spent after the stroke they have from asking him twenty times in a two hour span to take out the damn trash, and constantly getting "just after this raid" in response.

*whew*

For a parting thought, here's a good Hippie Joke I heard (or read, I think, on TWOP)...

Q: How can you tell when a Hippie has been in your house?

...

A: He's Still There!!!

Nons Sombres

2007-05-18T07:16:00.001-04:00

I can only think of two instances in my life where I have felt so completely exhausted, physically and mentally. The first was when I babysat a 13-month old girl for an entire week, and promptly swore off having children (at least I think I swore off 13-month olds and all babies too small to appreciate Spongebob Squarepants. I prefer they spring from my head like Athena from Zeus, five years old and fully potty-trained). The second time was the three days following my mom's surgery, which I stayed at the hospital and pretty much awake for about 70 hours. When I got a chance to go home and catch some sleep, I snored so loud I woke myself up. True Story.

Now, however, my fun old friend Mr. Insomnia visits me every night, and sometimes he brings along his good friend Ms. Super Distrubing Dreams. I think I've aged about 3 years in the past month. Just in time for summer!

Not that I don't have my reasons...dad has liver cancer and after next friday will be #2 on Duke's transplant list. My brother, grandpa and best friend all have birthdays this coming week and I'll not see a single one of them. Work has been grinding me to a little nub, and people are starting to notice I get sort of...well, evil when I haven't had enough sleep. Evil with horns, the real thing.

Not to worry, a vacation is nigh. After a long sojurn in Europe, BOBI's sister Molls comes home today (well, tonight). Tonight we pick her up from Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport, and tomorrow we're off to the North Shore, where their mom and her husband have a house right on Lake Superior. I could sit out on thier back porch for hours and look at the lake, hunt for sea-glass and skipping rocks on the shore, or just dig the always nicer (except in winter) temperatures. They even have a huge statue of a french guy! Check it out!

This guy is known as Pierre the Voyager. Don't he just Look French! I don't know who those people are, sorry.

Attack!

2007-04-16T17:17:00.000-04:00

For no reason, we gots all silly...

Spring Cleaning

2007-03-28T19:41:00.000-04:00

My new obsession is Title Trader. Thumbs up for getting rid of stuff I don't want, and getting shiny new stuff in return! It's free, in case you're broke.

Other new obsessions include Craigslist, Deadwood, Cooking, and Anderson Cooper. But really, who could blame me?

!!!!!

2007-03-12T07:26:00.000-04:00

Showtime is taking my favorite raido show This American Life and turning it into a weekly series.

If you've never listened to TAL...

One of the problems with our show from the start has been that whenever we try to describe it in a sentence or two, it sounds awful. For instance: Each week we choose a theme and put together different kinds of stories on that theme. That doesn't sound like something we'd want to listen to on the radio, and it's our show. In the early days of the program, in frustration, we'd sometimes tell public radio program directors that it's basically just like Car Talk. Except just one guy hosting. And no cars.

It's easy to say what we're not. We're not a news show or a talk show or a call-in show. We're not really formatted like other radio shows at all.

Instead, we do these stories that are like movies for radio. There are people in dramatic situations where things happen to them. There are funny moments and emotional moments and – hopefully – moments where the people in the story say interesting, surprising things about it all. It has to be surprising. It has to be fun. There are shows on public radio with no sense of fun or surprise and we hate those shows.

The program is on more than 500 public radio stations across the country. It's probably airing this weekend on a station near you, or you can just listen to the show here on this site. You can podcast or download last weekend's new show for free, stream older shows for free via any of our archive pages, or buy CDs. There are Greatest Hits CDs and other merch.

We have the themes because mostly they make it sound like there's a reason to hear a story about, say, a contest where everyone stands around a truck for days until one person is left standing ... or a grown man trying to convince his friend that he has heard the greatest phone message ever made ... or a man who's obsessed with Niagara Falls, lives minutes from the Falls, writes and thinks about the Falls all the time, but who can't bring himself to actually visit the Falls, because, as he says, "they've ruined the Falls." If you're not doing stories about the news, or celebrities, or things people have ever heard of elsewhere, you have to give people a reason to keep listening. The themes make it seem like there is a reason.

We think of the show as journalism. One of the people who helped shape the program, Paul Tough, says that what we're doing is applying the tools of journalism to everyday lives, personal lives.

Which is true. It's also true that the journalism we do tends to use a lot of the techniques of fiction: scenes and characters and narrative threads.

Meanwhile, the fiction we have on the show functions like journalism: it's fiction that describes what it's like to be here, now, in America. What we like are stories that are both funny and sad. Personal and sort of epic at the same time.

Some of the writers whose work has been on the program: David Sedaris, Sarah Vowell, Russell Banks, Dave Eggers, David Rakoff, Tobias Wolff, Jhumpa Lahiri, Anne Lamott, Michael Lewis, Michael Chabon, Nick Hornby, Alex Kotlowitz, Dan Savage, David Foster Wallace, Spalding Gray, Chris Ware, Gay Talese, Haruki Murakami, Aimee Bender, Lydia Davis, Junot Diaz, Sherman Alexie, Bill Buford.

We view the show as an experiment. We try things. There was the show where we taped for 24 hours in an all-night restaurant. And the show where we put a band together from the musicians' classified ads. And the show where we followed a group of swing voters for months, recorded their reactions to everything that happened in the election up through their final decision. And the show where one of our contributors went on a fast to find out if, in fact, fasting leads to enlightenment as promised.

We sometimes think of it as a documentary show for people who normally hate documentaries. A public radio show for people who don't necessarily care for public radio.

We're also producing a television show for the Showtime network, which will debut in 2007.

I can not tell you how much I love the idea!

Preview it here.

Fuck YOU, Ann!

2007-03-05T20:38:00.000-05:00

God, how I hate Ann Coulter.

I hope by now everyone has heard her comments regarding John Edwards...

"I was going to have a few comments on the other Democratic presidential candidate, John Edwards, but it turns out that you have to go into rehab if you use the word 'faggot,' so I'm - so, kind of at an impasse, can't really talk about Edwards, so I think I'll just conclude here and take your questions," said Coulter, whose comment was followed by applause.

You can get the full story here, and hopefully it will encourage you to visit Edward's website. I did. So there, Ann!

And as an added bonus, I'm providing a link to my lover Henry Rollins' Love Letter to Ann Coulter, because really, who could say it better?

I'm going to pull out the big gun now, the one I only use for super head cases....

Ann Coulter, you are a cunt.

There, I said it.

p.s. I also heard today that the Geico Cavemen are getting a TV pilot. What. The. Fuck. Deadwood gets cancelled and Cavemen get a pilot? People suck sometimes.

Snow Day...For Rizzle

2007-03-01T22:55:00.000-05:00

Imagine my joy when I was told I would be leaving at 2:15 today, and that the station was closing early due to heavy snow...Imagine my disappointment when I was told it was unpaid. Such as it is, I never look a gift horse (nor any horse) in the mouth, but take my 2 hours 15 minuites and run.

Taking a page from Sleep Goblins book, we went out in the snow to play. Brian tried his best at snowmanship, but tonights snow was far too dry and powdery.

Taking a break from all my worries sure does help a lot.

Those would be my "foot" prints.

Brian works on his wouldn't-be snowman.

Knee-deep!

No point to this one, I just really like my hat.

The Stalwart Hero.

This was actually a few days ago when I was cutting Brian's hair...I just wanted to give him a little emo mohawk...it's really cute with the red hair!

Winter Storm Warning

2007-02-24T08:22:00.000-05:00

There has been a lot of Buzz about the winter storm hitting Minnesota this weekend, we even cancelled going up to Two Harbors (damn it) for fear of being stuck in snow, freezing rain & 50 mph winds in the no-man's land between Duluth and the Twin Cities. So when I woke up at 3:00 a.m., I checked out the window to see if it was snowing. It had, in fact, already snowed...maybe a half inch. When I got back up at 7:00, it had not snowed any more than that. However, judging from the dark, swollen look of the sky, It looks as though we are about to be Fucked by Snow. All I could think was "I wish I'd stocked up on Chicken Wings."
What? I just woke up.

I wonder how Sleep Goblin and D.S. are faring, and if Wisconsin has in fact been Fucked by Snow yet.

So we may be staying in today...not that Brian could go anywhere since he sprained his ankle and is still kind of limpy. I'd like to pile up on the couch with Chicken Wings (damn it), Dr. Pepper, and a pile of movies...starting with Cleopatra, not because it's a good movie because really? It's not. No, I think my desire to see this movie stems directly from the fact that I'm still watching Rome on HBO. Also, I always thought Rex Harrison was totally Hot as Ceaser. What? Shut Up.

Ahh, Liz.

This is a much earlier version starring the Vivien Leigh. Has anyone out there seen this one? I'd like to watch it but I'd like a little feedback first.

Second in line for my fantasy viewing party would have to be Cry Baby aka an awesome movie/musical and the first movie I ever thought Johnny Depp was hot in. Yeow. By that time, Brian may have thrown himself off the roof. The only musicals he likes are Wicked and Grease. I managed to get him to sit through The Sound of Music with me...and I think he'd probably rather die that watch South Pacific or Guys and Dolls. His loss!

Three great reasons to watch this movie...Ricki Lake, Johnny Depp (the Winona Years) and Tracy Lords, yes that Tracy Lords.

Buy Me this Shirt!!!

Rounding it off owuld have to be How to Marry a Millionaire. Because I have a sincere appreciation for beauty, and this movie is packed with the 3 most awesomely beautiful women of their day. I like to think of it as an earlier, much earlier version of Charlie's Angels. Except instead of fight crime they try to find rich guys to marry. And Monroe was even hotter in Glasses.

Marilyn and Betty Grable.

Movies would be more fun if they still advertised like they used to, no?

And now...

Come to mama.

Whupped.

2007-02-21T07:07:00.000-05:00

I actually have been working on this retrospective on the Emo "movement", but right now I'm too tired to finish it. We're having a site visit tommorow from a huge company we're trying to woo, so things at work are crazy. I spent a half an hour under my desk yesterday bundling cables. It was so much fun, like camp! You want to hear something funny about my work vs. home life? Has everyone seen that Emerald Nuts commercail where Robert Gulet 'messes with your stuff'? If not watch it here. It's funny. This is, I'm neat. I'm not crazy psycho neat...I just don't like clutter. Everyone at work notices this (since I'm pretty much alone in the 'no clutter' camp) and says "Wow, your place must be soooooo clean". I just give a little 'heh' and go back to work, but what I'd like to tell them is that Robert Gulet visits me in my home, in the guise of Brian. We got a visit this past weekend from his mom & sister, and mom noted "It does NOT look like Brian lives here! You must have to tidy up all the time!" Well, she would know. Still...vindication!

A few other notes...

Could we just please please please bury Anna Nicole Smith already? Stop fighting over her corpse...it's CREEPY.

I want to see the movie 300 so bad it's not even funny....

I'm a little shocked to discover I'm laughing harder at the Colbert Report than I am the Daily show.

Next time...Emo!

One year ago...

2007-02-11T09:12:00.000-05:00

It was one year ago this week I was hopping on a plane to spend some quality time with the new man in my life Bobi. It was without a single doubt the best time I have ever had in my life. He was romantic, attentive, respectful, funny, and most of all...adorable! So one year later how does he stack up?

The same, only now I add 'messy' to that list.

So, taking a look back for this very happy landmark...

Why your ass should be watching Heroes...

2007-02-06T08:21:00.000-05:00

I know I blog about nothing but TV anymore, and it's not as though I'm not reading (Kate Atkinson's Not the End of The World) or listening to new music (Lily Allen's Alright, Still- look out, Stefani). But what takes up most of my time otherwise spent shopping, hanging, going out to dinner, etc. is now spent protecting my supple Southern skin from the dry, dry, superdry cold air. That means a humidifer and lots of tv.

I had a mild curosity about Heroes when it premiered on NBC...which I believe I missed so I could watch Battlestar Galactica (damn I miss DVR). Bri wanted to see it as well, though in his words..."for the Japanese guy". We sort of let it slide and just forgot about it. Then when BSG went on mid-season Hiatus and we finished Season 1 of The Office, we decided to check out The Japanese Guy.

Oh my god! I totally love this show! Anyone who knows me knows I love comic books...and what I love about Heroes (besides the hotties, but we'll get to that in a sec) is that the whole show is shot like a comic book Storyboard. It's creative, it's funny, it's sexy, it's got action, it's everything I've ever wanted in a television show (give or take a plot contrivance here and there). I just read that Eric Roberts would be joining the cast. I can only hope he's evil. And Gay. I had to endure the movie Spun and the only thing that got me through it was Eric Roberts as a Queen of a Drug King.

Which brings me to the other reason to watch this show...the hotness!

Issac Mendez - played by the lusciously named Santiago Cabrera.

He's the artist who paints the future, and comic books, and has bushy hair so of course I love him.

Peter Petrelli - played by Milo Ventimiglia

If you watched Gilmore Girls (and if you haven't then WHY haven't you? Go rent the DVDs Now!) you might know Milo better as Jess, Luke's brilliant-but-socially-malajusted nephew. He's hot here too. And a good actor. His character is sort of like Rogue from the X-men, but without the Hand issues.

Hiro Nakamura and Matt Parkman - Played by Masi Oka and Greg Grunberg

I put these two together because this photo is sooooo cute. Hiro can teleport, bend time and space, and make Waffles sound like the most fun thing in the world (Waffles, Yahoo!). Matt can read peoples thoughts, but his character arc is just plain dull. I love Greg Grunberg though, my love goes back to the days of Felicity.

Nathan Petrelli played by Adrian Pasdar

You might remember Adrian from his role as Chopper in Top Gun. Or, you might not. He plays an aspiring politician who can fly faster than the Concord, and Peter's older bro. Point in fact...he's hot, he's a jerk, he's got a super long head AND...he and Milo Ventimiglia play up the inappropriate brother touching to the point where even the guys on Supernatural are like "Dude". I think they do it on purpose, just to fuck with the audience. And I love them for it.

I'm not getting into Suresh, though he is hot, he's just boring.

I hope I've at least halfway convinced you to abandon your monday night activites in favor of my new addiction. If not go to NBC's Heroes Page where if I'm not mistaken you can watch (or preview) episodes.

Dilemma

2007-01-28T17:01:00.000-05:00

TCM showed Victor Victoria today, and it left me with this question...

Does the fact that I found Julie Andrews hot as a woman, a man, and a drag queen make me a Straight Woman, A Gay Man or a Lesbian?

Supernatural

2007-01-26T07:28:00.000-05:00

Last night's episode of Supernatural was going pretty well, up to the very end. At which point it became awesome. WonderDean and SuperSam made their getaway right under the noses of the Feds, while Styx's Renegade played in the background.

Could I take a second here to say I love that song? Easily the greatest Styx song ever.

And I'm worried about the place where Jared Padalecki's hair is going. It was on the border of Mulletville last night. I know that the show is all 'gritty' and 'hardcore', but that's one aspect of Metal that does NOT need representation on the show.

Note to CW: Ban Mullets!

That is all.

I heart Rome

2007-01-23T19:15:00.001-05:00

When I was about 12-13, I had an teensy obsession with the Ancient Roman Empire (read: Nerd), and read everything I could about Ceaser, Antony, Augustus, right up to Tiberius. The second season of Rome on HBO just really brings out the history geek in me. And it brings the lusty lusty big time. In the form of one Marc Antony, played by James Purefoy...

I guess Antony (in Ceaser's time anyway) would have been sort of a Rock Star. And with good reason. Has anyone Ever rocked a Toga like this guy?

He looks good in leather too.

Let's not forget my original Rome boyfriend, though married life has made him a kinder, gentler Titus Pullo...

...he is still hot stuff and not to be fooled around with.

Birthday Fun!

2007-01-15T11:27:00.000-05:00

We love red. Seriously.

Me, my Champagne, my injured kitty.

You bet your Perogie he's polish.

More Floor. Blurrier Now

Bubbles make me happy.

BOBI is my Snow Angel!

Beer + Snow = Awesome.

I'm 29! Let's get tipsy!

Let's Get Personal...

2006-12-18T11:04:00.000-05:00

This morning I woke up and felt like (finally) following through with my original idea of an Open letter to Joss Whedon. I wanted to make a whole site of it, but being myself was too lazy and distracted. Crystal was the one who finally grabbed the idea and ran with it, and she's done an excellent job of getting the Dear Joss livejournal community up and running, and her own letter was especially touching, to me anyway...I'm Mentioned!!! So after a year plus I finally added my own letter to the queue...click here to read it. And while you're there, take some time to browse the archives. There are some incredibly sweet letters in there...it's well worth the read, even if you aren't a fan. (In which case, why are you reading this blog?)

Back in the real world, Bobi and I completed our Christmas shopping this weekend. It was so nice to get out of the house for once on the weekend. We went to Mall of America...and you know what that means...Tiger Sushi! We had our usual 'Battle Ship Six' Combo...scallops, spicy yellowfin, salmon, tuna...all beautifully seasoned. After eating our fill, we headed down to the Urban Outfitters store, because they ususally have the most unique gifts. If you still have last minuite shopping to do, it's definitely the place to go.

Since posts have been so few and far between, I'll go ahead and wish everyone a happy holiday, be it Christmas, Hanukkah, Solstice, Kwanzaa, or Boxing Day!

America's Next Top Spud.

2006-12-05T11:25:00.000-05:00

As in potato...as in the type that grows on couches...as in me. After the whir and blur of the thanksgiving holiday, I've been trying to catch up on my lethargy. As evidenced by my non-posting. Speaking of the holiday, allow me to recap.

Driving, driving, driving, Speeding ticket, driving driving driving, family friends turkey, pie, card games, driving driving driving speeding ticket, driving driving driving.

Let me just say that Both speeding tickets were Bri's, I did the bulk of the driving and didn't get pulled once. I've said before that Rural Illinois is my personal vision of hell, that view is still firmly in effect.

I've spent the time since we got home getting caught up on House MD, Battlestar Galactica, Firefly, and because I am a glutton for punishment, America's Next Top Model, but that mostly because I'm always trying to figure out if Tyra Banks is in fact a draq queen. The evidence is leaning more & more twords a "Yeah, girl!"

The Pre-Trip Freak out.

2006-11-09T07:18:00.000-05:00

Next weekend we start the journey down to SC, in our wee car. I am not kidding myself, I know I'll be doing a good portion of the driving, since Bri can't be in a moving vehicle and awake at the same time. Which is cool, because I can then listen to Tori Amos without his overdramatic reaction of "TURN IT OFF! I'M DYING!!!" Maybe it's a boy thing? Or maybe it's just that Bri likes mostly Crap, rather than music. If I had to listen to any of his generic not-punk crap rock for two days, I'd have to give up and start shooting. Lucky for me, once he's out nothing short of throwing him out of the car at a high speed will wake him. I know, I've tried.

Just us playing with the laptop...

p.s. Crystal - I want to see you while I'm in town! When can you come down from Greenville? We're leaving on friday the 24th.

2006-10-24T07:41:00.000-04:00

What a hectic weekend. Sunday I told Brian to take the car so I could check the oil in the van and then maybe do a little shopping. He did take the car, but he also took the van key with him. Luckily for me, Adam is sweet and fluffy as a puppy and dropped the key off for me. UNluckily for me, the van stalled out on a very busy street leaving the mall. I had no cell phone, no one to call, and no one to help me get the fucker back into the parking lot. Right when I was beginning to break down in tears a very nice, slightly creepy older guy helped me get the van into the parking lot and offered me a ride, to which I replied "No thanks, I'll call a cab". I then saw he had his 11-ish year old son with him in the car and went anyway, figuring it served me right if I got hatchet murdered. I didn't think the guy would do any grisly crimes with his kid in the car (since watching Dexter I may change my mind) but I had my keys in the weapon position, just in case. The guy turned out to be a true good samaritan, so thankfully I'm still alive. Of course that isn't making the van any less FUBAR. Also went to see The Prestige with Adam on Sunday, if you haven't seen this movie...SEE IT!!! And then say "what the EFF?". Christian Bale is Not un-yummy in this movie, and who can resist a cameo of David Bowie as Nikola Tesla? I was so fascinated with the Tesla-Edison rivalry side story that I've decided to read up on Tesla, as soon as I'm finished with The Historian.

I also found out that my aunt, one of my favorite people in the whole world, has agressive breast cancer. They are going to start her on Chemotherapy immediately and once they have the tumor shrunk down they'll do a mastectomy. My dad is with her now, but I wish I could be too.

Here are a few of the things I love about Minnesota:

A view from just outside my apartment.

Another one. This was taken right at sunset, and the picutre does not do justice to the fall colors.

The Twins. My whole life I always secretly wanted younger sisters.

These guys were just hanging out on my patio. I started giving them snacks and they would peck at each other or chase each other around for them. It was totally cute.

And speaking of totally cute...

Snow in October

2006-10-13T07:18:00.000-04:00

Just another one of those things that makes this place so alien to me sometimes, freaking snow for the past 3 days now. Even the snow is different here than it is in the south, the flakes are bigger, fatter, and...I dunno, Dryer somehow. Snow in the south is always wet. Or at least the air is. The colder air here is completely opposite of what I'm used to, which is a damp cold that seems to seep into your bones and make them ache. This is more a biting, sharp cold. Of course I've heard all the caveat's of my coworkers, "This is Nothing!" and "You haven't seen anything yet!", and I suppose that's true. The lower 30's may not be the coldest to them, but it is pretty much winter temperatures to me. So, Brrr. And also, Yay! I'm totally enjoying it so far, except for the very unpleasant rawness I've gotten inside my nose from the super dry air. It's very distracting.

And speaking of distractions, I'm a TV zombie. I'm juggling Three shows that I not only enjoy but obsess over. Currently I'm being wooed by Lost on Wednesday night, followed immediately by Project Runway, and my Friday nights are all Battlestar Gallactica. You might notice the absence of Smallville. Well, sorry folks. With James Marsters gone, and no possiblility of any more Dr. SoFine, the only reason to watch is the still-fun Clark-Lex homoerotic tension. And even that does not outweigh having to put up with Erica Durance. Just DIE already Lois. I think at this point I prefer Margot Kidder's Lois. (Never Teri Hatcher)

Archive Moment!

One year ago today I was raving about Graffiti!

Dun Dun DUHHHHN!

2006-10-06T08:01:00.000-04:00

The Dirty Pants are back, FYI.

DIRTY!

Leftovers

2006-10-04T07:16:00.000-04:00

My friend Kate just came to visit this past weekend for her birthday. We had three days of shopping, eating, occasionally drinking and then shopping some more. Here are some photos, along with some old ones that have been on the camera for a while.

Kate and I doing our Best Patti Hearst's at GameWorks.

Brian kills Zombies Dead. er.

I was the only one who wanted this Map Picture

Nicole Ritchie! Come back!

Sucking down The Perfect Margarita in my new shirt from Delia*s

She does look a little bit like a cartoon!

Brain Freeze!

When in Rome...er, Wisconsin...

I have no idea why I look so confused.

The Target Ninja will kick your ass!

Oh Give Me A Break!

2006-09-14T10:35:00.000-04:00

I'm sure by now you've all heard about what happened in Montreal. I have to say...

...what a loser!

The following is my open letter to the late shooter:

Vampirefreaks.com?!? I cannot roll my eyes hard enough. You were a walking cliche`, what with the black trech coat, pictures of you holding a knife (note the Ozzy t-shirt) and giving us little bon mots like "Life sucks, school sucks, work sucks". REALLY!?! I'd never considered the possibilities before. Maybe if you had gotten off of your ASS and stopped playing "Super Columbine Massacare" for five minuites you might have noticed things that don't suck. Things like...Sex, for instance. You should have tried it, it's one hell of a way to let off steam. Dude, you may be dead, but you are still LAME.

Yay for Spain!!!

2006-09-13T14:06:00.002-04:00

Spain likes Junk in Da Trunk.

Throwing Stuff

2006-09-12T07:25:00.000-04:00

You will notice that I have removed the aforementioned love of my life from my blog links, as Tolbs said...I threw him into the woodchipper. Of EDUCATION!

Anyway, he's been "replaced" by M. Giant's Velcrometer. I got hooked on this Blog when I lived in SC. He's smart, hilarious, eloquent (mostly) and a lover of cats, what's not to love? AND he writes Recaps for Television Without Pity!?! AND lives in the Twin Cities as I now do?!? He's great, go read.

And when you're done with that, I sugguest FourFour. Who knew entertainment could be so...entertaining?

I deeply regret that I watched part of ABC's Miniseries '911'. All that spin is making me dizzy.

Back to Basics (for now)

2006-09-11T07:33:00.000-04:00

I don't know what I was thinking with that last template. Dreamweaver for beginners, much? Anyway, It's been like a month since I posted anything, because my life has gotten it's little groove. Wake up, go to work, come home, Law & Order/Project Runway, bed. I really blame it on the 'dog days' of summer. By the time the end of summer rolls around, I'm usually something akin to a zombie. I want to go somewhere (don't know where) want to do something (but I don't know what) so I usually just end up taking a nap. Last thrusday it was 80 degrees. Friday it was 63. It's been between 50 and 60 degrees all weekend, and I Feel fabulous (except physically, sudden drops in temperature like that don't affect me well). The first days of really cool fall air always lift my spirits, make me feel so happy, calm and completely energetic at the same time.

Other good news is that my good friend Kate is flying up to visit me at the end of the month, which is very exciting. I've taken lots of photos since my last post, but don't have time to post them now, as I have to get ready for work. Ta!

p.s. I promise that BOBI is alive and well. He's just very busy with his hopefully last year of school (undergrad), trying to figure out a car-sharing schedule, working, and messing up all this neat. He's still very funny, smart (in his own clueless way) and is even more adorable than when you last saw him. He'll be back, I promise.

Send Ash your love...and also Jewlery, Fruit Baskets, Cash, etc.

2006-08-22T07:22:00.000-04:00

Ashley,

Remember that time the old man came into my office and felt me up? Who was the first person I called? Remember when Chris fired me? Who was the first one I told? For some reason, I've always gone straight to you with all that stuff. Now my working conditions are better, but I forget that you guys are still in the no-labor-laws trenches. Let me just say that you are better than that dank, evil little gossip mill. And look at the benefits...

- No more Apple-Queen Bathroom Scenarios
- No more Whitney Houston
- No more Lady wearing a paper clip in her hair
- No more stinky, wierd and downright creepy Old Men.
- No more Ice Queen Office managers
- No more Bad Mascara Ladies! (wish I could say the same)
- No more Maternity Wear Tragedies!
- No more moldy paneling
- No more parking lot full of nails and broken glass

I hope that helps. I am just so mad I could spit! However, my cat is trying to eat a spider so that one may have to wait.

Random Observation

2006-08-11T13:36:00.000-04:00

I've noticed this at just about every supermarket I've ever been in. While perusing the juice aisle for some Cran-Grape or maybe a nice Pink Grapefruit juice, my eyes wander up to the top shelf where I see....Clam Juice.

Huh?

I understand that this is an ingredient necessary for Clam Chowder. But could we Please just keep it in the soup aisle? Or on top of the seafood cabinet? When it's in with the rest of the juice, it's impossible for me to stop thinking about pouring myself a big glass of...Clam Juice.

With Ice.

Your Family Stone is a Turd

2006-08-09T00:05:00.000-04:00

WHO told me that I would like the movie The Family Stone(starring Sara Jessica Parker and the ever-yummy Luke Wilson)?!? Remind me to step on that person's toe really, really hard.

I hated, Hated, HATED this movie. Maybe I'm overly sensitive, maybe I Identified with it a bit too much, maybe I just really don't like Diane Keaton and this film made me outright hate her. In any case, I know what it's like to be an outsider in a significant other's family, to be completely misunderstood, shut out, shuffled aside. Thank bejeebus BOBI's family is nothing like that, that they are as kind and giving as he is.

In other news, I've been having dreams so bad I don't want to go to sleep. As if my insomnia needed a helping hand.

Comic Life is my new toy....

2006-07-31T21:06:00.000-04:00

Crystal, you can't do this on an Acer!

2006-07-31T07:28:00.000-04:00

I've finally got my routine down, Wake up, Coffee, Shower, Work, Home, Dinner, TV/Book, Bed. I get a kick out of breaking routine too. This weekend I finally made my way in to Minneapolis to the Skywalk, or Skymall, or Nicollet Mall, whatever you want to call it. All these buildings in Downtown (or is it uptown? Shit!) Minneapolis are connected my second-level walkways, so you can walk all over the area and not have to sweat because it's 102 degrees outside. I finally got to go to the Bead Monkey, I've been making jewlery like crazy to get ready for my Etsy store. I had a fabulous hamburger (and 2 Blue Moon Pale Ales) at Ike's, and got book 4 in the Sandman series. A decidedly relaxing, not-too-productive weekend.

A Vacation's All I Ever Wanted.....

2006-07-19T07:28:00.000-04:00

Here are a few pictacles from our vacation. They're mostly just lovingly shot photos of BOBI, he'll have a damned portfolio soon. Any way...click here to see em all. I'm off to work!!!

What? I like toast.

I'm looking for ships!

Someone was tired of having is picture taken.

Feets!

This is what happens to Lakes when Mayhem balls explode in them.

FIRE!!!

Lake in the Early Morning

A way over-exposed picture of Molly.

Brian's Mom and the Famous Uncle Tom. And his Famous Sunglasses.

Sara post-Mayhem. Recognize the neclace? It's my green 'floater' necklace I made!

BOBI in mid-laugh at one of Uncle Tom's letters. Has there ever been a better picture, ever?

Tired!

2006-07-12T18:24:00.000-04:00

We just got back from a 4-day mini Vacay in Wisconsin, it was the Best! I got a sunburn, and went swimming in an awesomely clean lake, got to spend lotsa time with my Manz and his fam (including the Famous Uncle Tom), and last but not least, ate ate ate. They looooooove Bratwurst up here. I don't get it either. We took a TON of pictures and Bobi has some hilarious Vid to share soon enough.

And the good keeps coming! Today at work I was informed that I would be getting a raise effective monday! It's pretty much an ego boost considering I've been there for only 30 days. Woo-whoo!

On the downside, It's finally time to have something done about this tooth. Bad Tooth!

Why I Love BOBI

2006-07-04T18:07:00.000-04:00

Because you can't help but love a man in a hat.

Lovely St. Paul, where we went for the Taste of Minnesota festival. Minnesota tastes like Gyros, Cookies, Lemonade, Shrimp and Footlongs.

The Happiest Place on Earth! This photo has been resized to protect my bosoms.

Also, He's adorable. And so am I.

Happy Fourth of July! I eagarly await the genuine freaking-out my cats always have caused by the sound of fireworks!

Per Kimberlina's Request...

2006-06-30T07:35:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures...

You guys know those MOSHI pillows? Brian and Molly figured out they looked Russian with Moshi on their heads.

Lets's forget that it's purple, no?

Brian tries to take a picture of my cleavage and gets a blurry photo os my cross instead. MWAHAHA! The Lord Hath Smiteth this Photo! Thanks Jesus!

A "floating" bead necklace...greens, mostly.

Triple-Strand Amethyst w/toggle clasp.

Hand-beaded Vintage fabric cuff bracelet

And my very first buttonhole! I did that by hand, since my sewing machine doesn't have the foot thingie I need for it.

My Law & rder: Criminal Intent Earrings...since I made them during a D'Onofrio marathon.

Buddy is so happy to have vertical blinds again!!!

As it happens

2006-06-26T18:54:00.000-04:00

It turns out that over the past few years, perhaps, I've developed an intolerance to carrots. I really am not all that surprised, considering my grandmother has the exact same problem.
I am feeling much better, though still not 100 percent. Bobi was very sweet and very helpful to me while not feeling well. And today I somehow got an embroidery needle stuck half an inch inside my big toe (buried in the carpet, I must get a pincushion) he yanked it out for me, and then held a papertowel on it until it stopped bleeding. Maybe I'm not having the best week, but at least I have the best boyfriend!

Also, he downloaded Season 1 of Rome for me so I could once again Revel in the raw masculine prowess that is Titus Pullo. And so I could see James Purefoy's Wang. (Sleep Goblin, look for your copy to arrive shortly)

Hey guess what?!? We found the camera dock! So here are some pics I took earlier this month when we were getting settled (it looks much better now).

Ah yes, the monster monitor. It is good for watching TV on. Especially TV involving Purefoy's Wang.

The bedroom wall. Really, everything being all stark white looks quite pretty. When the sun is shining.

My first Minnesota garage sale find! Isn't is the cutest? I paid $.50 for it, and it really brings out the orange in the bedspread.

The futon cover and pillows I made...and the cat that gets them all Hairy.

Freaking Out

2006-06-24T05:24:00.000-04:00

Posting at 4:30 a.m. on a saturday morning, as I sit here huddled in a blanket, shivering and trying to force down a sprite. This is my first real illness since coming up here, the kind that comes on fast and unexpectedly. It's also my first time being sick and far away from my mom. Call me spoiled, or a baby, you wouldn't be wrong.

Do you know the one thing no one ever, ever, EVER wants to get? I got it. I don't want to go into too much detail because...well, it's gross. Let's just say it involves the word impaction and vomiting. If you can connect the dots you might ask your self why I'm not trying to drink clorox instead of sprite. I want to go wake Bobi and ask him to take care of me, but really what can he do, other than be really grossed out? I miss my mom.

Worst part? I probably won't be able to make it to Sleep Goblin's engagement party now. Should I send Bobi in my stead? Dammit! I bought an outfit for the occasion and everything!

Light Urple

2006-06-20T07:44:00.000-04:00

Just a few things to say before I have to get ready for work...

I really, really, really like my new job. Everyone there is super nice, and the benefits are amazing. My boss thinks I'm "outstanding", which is a feeling I haven't had for a while.

Brian took me to JoAnn fabrics up here, Oh GOD! It's HUGE! I could have wandered around for hours and hours....Brian could not have. I made a new cover for my futon and am now working on some drapes. I figured if I'm going to watch Law & Order: Criminal Intent for hours, I might as well sew.

We're talking about getting me a car sometime really soon....I hope so, our car schedule is hairy at best, between both of our jobs and now his summer class. And speaking of cars....I had no idea that Minnesota required a lisence tag on the front AND back of the car....and that they came in the mail together...I thought it was just one tag, so I screwed them both on to the back....much to Brian's amusement.

Also...never assume your highlights have grown out. They may not have! I wanted to try a darker blonde color....and my highlights turned this really bizarre purple (Light Urple?) gray shade. Adam took one look and said "You look...so....OLD".

And then I killed him.

Bi-weekly update

2006-06-09T15:45:00.000-04:00

Things are starting to smooth out here, I have kitties, my apartment, a job. Now If I can find someone my own age to talk to, life will be good. Do you know how frustrating it is to get nothing but a blank stare anytime you quote 'Dirty Dancing'?

Our place is coming together nicely, I found this awesome old print of these really orange flowers at a garage sale for $.50, so I hung it in the bedroom where it really sets off our new Ikea Bedding. It's so bright and pretty and calming in there...how will I ever be able to get up in the mornings to go to work?

And speaking of waking up, that has so far been the absolute best part of my day. I'm not saying It's all downhill from there or anything, but every morning when I wake up, it feels like such a happy surprise. No matter how much I complain about Bobi's preference for Crap music or his lack of 'Dirty Dancing' trivia (which, by the way, should improve since I forced him to watch it two nights ago) I know that we go together like Peanut Butter and Honey.

Now I want a sandwich.

Also, I'm currently re-watching season 1 of Carnivale`, anybody have any idea when season 2 comes out on DVD?

I love Clancy Motherfucking Brown. Don't look at me, that's what they call him over at TWOP.

Right now it's about *maybe* 70 degrees, cloudy and overcast and wanting to rain. Think I'll heat up some pound cake and get caught up on 'The 4400'. I've been taking a ton of pictures but can't find the dock to upload them. Solly!

At Long Long Last

2006-05-31T10:23:00.000-04:00

We start moving in to our new apartment tommorow! I can't express the relief I will feel at having my own stuff, and kitties, nearby. It's been okay here, there haven't been any roommate snafus, and we seem to have a bathroom schedule down pretty well. It's just cramped, and there is an incredibly adorable, incredibly sweet girl who is thinking about renting out B.'s room, so I don't worry so much about leaving the boys in the dust. They'll be juuuuuuuust fine.

Yesterday I had an appointment with one of the nicer (and busier - holy cow) temp agencies up here. I've been temping for quite a few years now, so it was interesting to see that the interview process was much much more rigorous, much more selective, and the testing was a bit more advanced. I still did awesome on my tests, but I actaully had to sit there and think (can you imagine?) about what I was doing, as oppossed to the tests they give in SC, that I can breeze through with my eyes closed and have a perfect score (I'm talking to you, Addeco). Also the insurance benefits available to Temps in SC are, let's face it, nonexistant. When I temped through Snelling, you had to have so many thousands of work hours accumulated before you even qualified for insurance, how awful is that? At one point I despaired over the hole I was in, making too much money for Medicaid (a whopping 8 bucks an hour) and not enough to afford the high premiums the agency's carrier charged. Here it is TOTALLY different, I can enroll now and recieve my benfits in 60 days, and the premiums for health, dental, and short-term disability are super affordable.

This past weekend Tolbs came up to visit B. and see his new car. (B. just got a new car 2 weeks ago, I'm now driving the Purple Minivan, aka the Purple Blur, aka The Peeb. I Love It.) I had heard that Tolbs, who must be something like 6'3" and 160 lbs (he's a lanky guy) was one of the fastest eaters ever. BAL-ONEY, I said. I have always been the fastest eater I know, which I know is not something most folks would necessarily Brag about, but there you go. We went to the Twin Cities Grill where I had the brilliant Idea to challenge Tolbs to a Steak-Off. He got the Porterhouse, i got the Prime Rib, both 20 ounce steaks. I was starving so I figured I would wolf it down in no time. He was done with his when I was just over half finished. So yes, Andy...you DO own me at steak eating. But just wait until I make Kebobs! I will surely even the score!

In any case, I almost made myself sick and vowed that the next time I eat a $25 steak, I'm going to enjoy it, dammit.

Here are some pics I've taken recently...

My B. Playing World of Warcraft with no shirt on. RAWOR.

Sea Glass that myself, B. and his sisters helped me find on the North Shore. It is sooooo beautiful there, next time we're up I'm going to remember the camera, dammit!

I have once again succumbed to The Sims. *twitch*

Last Night Pics

2006-05-25T12:08:00.000-04:00

So I am now able to get out of bed without sneezing all over myself, which means it's time for a job! My days of leisurely playing The Sims is OVAH. Wish me luck, I need the money. My vet bill (just the check-up & shots, not including boarding) is so high I don't know when I'll be able to get my kitties out of hock.

Any old who, Kate sent me some photos of our last night out...hope ya'll enjoy.

From L to R, Tony, Kate, Marc, Tara, Me.

I look so transcendental.

Me and my friend Marc, who says "WHAAW!" Mike Ness-Style.

Yeeeah, sorry...

2006-05-24T00:06:00.000-04:00

Looks like one of B.'s bad habits (not posting often enough) is already rubbing off on me. The past week has gone by in a whirl. I celebrated my arrival in The land of 10K lakes by promptly getting a cold. Which I still have. So If I have not called you, I'm very very sorry. It's not that I'm not thinking about you, because I AM. I've just been sick, and I'll have to get a new cell provider, Alltell gets zero reception up here.

But I love you all and miss you all and will talk to you very soon!

Lots to tell. Well, Some to tell. Okay...mere scraps to tell. Stay tuned.

Mwah.

Wandering...

2006-05-18T18:22:00.000-04:00

So this week I made my emotional goodbyes to family, friends, car, home and assorted possesions and make the trek up to Minnesota. Just me, my dad, two cats and all of my earthly fortune. We set off monday morning, and stopped monday afternoon. In a traffic jam. For three hours.

Damn you, Chemical Spill!!!

Eventually we made our way up to my brother's place in Knoxville, where he took me to work with him at WUTK "The Rock". I got to pick out a song for his show (Autolux: Turnstile Blues) and squeak a hello over the air. I also pillaged the freebie cabinet, pirate-style.

Tuedsay we set out from Tennessee, which was by far the most pleasant part of the trip, the portion from Knoxville up into Kentucky. We passed by the Original, first ever, KFC...which I quickly dismissed as a dinner option.

Indianapolis was unremarkable, other than parts of it smelled a lot like sweetgrass.

Rural Illinois...what can I say? Flat, Farmy, and after hours on end of flat and farmy, Grueling.

Wisconsin was actually quite pretty in a very Winslow Homer sort of way. We stopped at a huge wall of rock that as it turns out, was an Island in what used to be a glacial lake. We saw lots of cows, Buffalo (!) and HOLY CRAP the Deer are HUGE here. They make the Deer found in SC look dwarfy.

I crossed the Mississippi river for the first time that I can remember when we travelled through the Twin Cities, and with the perfectly cool, sunny weather it would have been an ideal arrival, except that we arrived right in the middle of
Rush Hour. I was suddenly glad I sold my car.

My dad and brother and B. managed to get all my stuff in a 5 x 10 storage space in like...less than an hour. My dad and brother took off right after, heading back south. I was sad to see them go, but I feel better now that I am here. The cats are currently boarding at a really great facility that lets me come visit every day until we get into our apartment. Now, unbelieveably...I'm going to wash B.'s clothes and make his dinner. It sounds revolting, I know. But he's at work and there is little else to do. Besides, I miss cooking at the moment. It will give me the feeling that everything is still somewhat normal. Of course I'm making southern food.

What did you expect?

And Oh! How the mighty did fall!

2006-05-11T12:21:00.000-04:00

Going through some old school papers, I found an article that I had saved from many, many years ago (way back in those dark ages known as "the 90's") entitled Working Our Nerves: Those Stupid Frigging Mentos Commercials.

Holy crap! An old article from the back page of Sassy Magazine! JOY!!!

I attribute so much of my individuality to reading Sassy in those formative teenaged years. Sassy, unlike it's fluffy counterparts YM and Seventeen, encouraged political and critical thinking, creativity, and individual style. In the pages of Sassy you could find articles about Gay teens, The Ecology of the Amazonian Rainforests, Reader fiction, the Zine of the month, and so on and so on. I don't ever recall seeing a single diet plan (in fact, one of the most hilarious articles was a staff sampling of various junk foods), or tips on how to win a boyfriend. Sassy treated its readers, us teenaged girls, as intelligent young people capable of thinking of something other than what to wear to prom.

And the music! Don't even get me started. If not for Sassy, I never would have known about The Lemonheads, Superchunk, Juliana Hatfield and Shonen Knife were. I never would have thought of Iggy Pop or Mike D of the Beastie Boys capable of giving sound advice in the "Dear Boy" monthly column, and I never would have picked up a Poppy Z. Brite book (not that I still read Ms. Brite, but I do admit how important her writing was when it came to the way I read) and I would not have known about places like CBGB.

That was until March 1995. I hadn't gotten an issue in 3 months and was starting to get PISSED, I had just renewed my subscription for another year. When it finally arrived, I was at first confused, then crestfallen, then furious. My beloved Sassy was gone forever. Still alive in Name only, the magazine had been sold to a Los Angeles Publishing company who were also to blame for Teen magazine, of which I only ever bought ONE issue in my entire teenage years. Nervous at pressure from advertisers who found Sassy to be a bit too cutting-edge for teenage girls (god forbid we don't have someone telling us how to think) the entire publication was "revamped" from cover to cover. Evan Dando, Sonic Youth and Cowboy Fashion were booted out in favor of Quizzes about which celebrity you were meant to date and how to cure your zits. I still shake my fist over this from time to time, though it's nothing compared to my outrage at the time. The remainder of my subscription would promptly go from mailbox to trash can, and I felt a sick relief when the magazine folded soon after.

To see why Sassy was so great, I suggest checking out Sissy, which is the last issue of Sassy, scrapped when the magazine was sold. Also check out Lisa Jervis' Salon.com Article on the Death of Sassy and Why Sassy made Irene Dispatch Flush Glamour.

That's my two cents.

Almost Done!

2006-05-10T13:15:00.000-04:00

I am ex.haus.ted. I've had enough cardboard, newspapers, brooms and trashbags to last me through the rest of the year.

When you move, you re-discover things you had lost or forgotten...and here is one I just HAVE to share with you...

What you are seeing, other than my adorable feet, is a gourmet raspberry-creme filled chocolate.
Shaped like a shrimp.
These were my valentines day candy last year. I knew one day I would tell the world about chocolate shrimp!!!

I took great pride in throwing away this Sheryl Crow CD. WHO the hell was dumb enough to give that to me anyway?!?

My last night in Columbia may turn into an event. A laser-tag/go-cart event. Frankie's Fun Park deserves its own farewell too, I think!

Law & Order withdrawls! Damn You, Basketball!!!

2006-05-07T22:05:00.000-04:00

In lieu of actually saying something, here are some pictures I took today...

Me and one of my Bestest friends in the world, Trevor.

My face always looks so damned ROUND next to Christina's! Dammit!

I get fuzzy love!

A cat. An Elephant. Some shoes.

Mister Grumpy Face!

Check out my Cheekbone!!!

Blue teardrop Necklace made by yours truly.

Bead necklace handcrafted and presented to Amber as graduation gift...also by me!

The Further Packing Adventures of Punkrakwbethies

2006-05-06T11:55:00.000-04:00

I love how craft night at my house turns into Drinking & Dancing night at the Art Bar, but Hey! No complaints! I was wanting to go to my favoite place with my favorite girls (Read: Crystal, Ash, Kate, Tara didn't make it), and wouldn't you know that my last night (for who knows how long) at the Art Bar was also my first night Dancing with my Divas? We left around 12ish, when my eyes were beginning to sting from the smoke. I couldn't help feeling sad that a) this would probably be the last time in a looong time we all got to hang out together and b) Ash forgot her blasted camera! Seeing Crystal sipping a Jagerbomb while wailing "I Can't Chug!!!" was somehow worth it all. Take my word for it, it was SO CUTE!!!

Of course last nights festivies equaled me waking up feeling like I'd been steamrolled. I decided that twenty eight was indeed too old to be getting hangovers, and have therefore sworn off Jagerbombs.

Today I'm resisting the urge to go to the fabric stores (I found a reeeeallly great one in Northeast) and am instead packing. Today I've packed all the clothes except for what I'll wear this coming week, and the extra towels and sheets. If I could only get rid of some of this furniture I'd be blasted DONE! Then all I would have to do is sit back and craft until next saturday, when we'll be loading up the van. I've started doing Embriodery, and am now devouring the floss aisle at Hobby Lobby. I must get EVERY. FLIPPING. COLOR. EVAR.

NOOOOOO!!!!!

Speaking of...please check out Divas. I updated today. Go there. Or face my wrath, puny one!

Three Things to keep me from packing...

2006-05-04T15:45:00.000-04:00

3 Names you go By: Beth, Bethies, Lynda

3 Screen Names you Have Had: Bee, Punkrawkbethies, The Moxie Proxy

3 Things you Like about Yourself: Geeky, Smarmy, Funny

3 Things you Don't Like about Yourself: whiny, bad speller, cranky

3 Parts of Your Heritage: Norwegian, Jewish, French

3 Things that Scare You: riding shotgun with my brother driving, clowns, roosters

3 of Your Everyday Essentials: Crafts, food of some sort, a nighttime bath

3 Things you are Wearing Right Now: skirt, t-shirt, flip-flops

3 of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists: Arcade Fire, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Radiohead

3 of Your Favorite Songs: "Tunnels" Arcade Fire, "Photobooth" Death Cab for Cutie, "Wig in a Box" Hedwig & the Angry Inch

3 Things you Want to Try in the Next 12 Months: Make some friends in a new city, teach Bobi how to cook, do some volunteer work.

3 Things You Want in a Relationship: Companionship, sense of humor, intellect.

2 Truths and a Lie: I prefer salty snacks to sweet snacks. I'd rather have Potato chips than Ice cream. I dislike chocolate.

3 Things about the Opposite Sex that Appeal to You: Brains, Brawn, Boink-ability.

3 Things about the Same Sex that Appeal to You: Ease of conversation, sense of humor, buy me lunch.

3 Things you Just Cannot Do: bring myself to do more packing today, rollerskate, live with my mother.

3 of Your Favorite Hobbies: Crafting, Cooking, Law & Ordering

3 Things You Want to do Really Bad Right Now: To see my manz, to hire a moving company, to go shopping for craft supplies.

3 Careers you are Considering: Freelance Blogger, Buyer, International Superstar

3 Places You Want to Go on Vacation: Europe, Japan, Aspen

3 Kids Names: Robert, Claire, Qwendravius 1-9

3 Things you Want to Do Before you Die: finish my degree, fix my credit, kiss my man.

3 Ways you are Stereotypically a Boy: I like beer, I like Pizza, I like sex.

3 Ways you are Stereotypically a Chick: I get irrational and cranky once a month, I like shopping, I collect shoes.

3 Celeb Crushes: James Marsters, Vincent D'Onofrio, Christian Kane

3 People You Would Like to Complete This Quiz: Lex Luthor, The Easter Bunny, My Gal Friday.

Packing

2006-05-03T11:32:00.000-04:00

Unpacking is never a big deal to me, in fact that's my favorite part of moving. It's the packing that sucks. Weeding out all the stuff you don't need or want, wrapping the breakables, marking boxes, it all sucks.

Usually I'm able to be very business-like about it, but this time It feels so much more personal. It took me two years to turn my little apartment into home, and I AM going to miss the cheap rent and hardwood floors. Not to mention I've always loved Columbia, the perfect mix of city and town.

To celebrate the last two years, and give my apartment and Columbia the proper send-off, here are some of my favorite memories from this place:

Me, my short hair, my granny afgan and my fat cat.

Sometimes I hate 1950's advertising. Stupid disembodied head!!! This was at the Old Mill Antique Mall

Having my manz in my kitchen made me SO HAPPY!!!

Skylar and Yoshimi (a black belt in Karate) before the dog was banned from my house for making indoor poo.

Tiki man and Papsan Chair both fell victim to the Moving Sale. Farewell!!!

Yes, it's me in my underwear.

Tara and a very convincing Tammy Faye at Art Bar Halloween.

Two of my paintings.

Mollie and Buddy.

Another one of my paintings, along with the Drapes I made (thanks, Ash!) and the entertainment center I put together.

Me and Crystal look like an Orbit Commercial. Brilliant!

I get MAD Love!!!!

2006-05-01T15:40:00.000-04:00

No matter what else happens for the rest of the day, even if it's news I don't want to hear about the apartment, NOTHING will bring me down after seeing This.

Bobi and Spinning Girl can BOTH stuff it!!! I've Got my OWN 'Ode to Me' Now! Well, maybe not so much an "Ode" as an "interperative dance", but in my opinion FAR better. Who needs stuffy old Odes anyway?

Ashley is way more than forgiven for missing my stupid moving sale for that! Girlfriend, where'd you learn to shake your booty like that?

Huge Hugs and Smiles all around!!!

Duck!

2006-04-29T16:24:00.000-04:00

When I say "duck", I am not referring to the cute little waterfowl that waddles around going "wah-waaaah", I am referring to the act of taking cover or shielding yourself from potential airborn harm.

Like an egg.

Last night I was standing on my front porch with my friend Marc when I noticed an older vehicle driving ever so sloooooooowly past my house. A white, oval-shaped missle sailed over in my direction and hit the ground just a few feet away. The car sped up and Marc said "You just got EGGED!!! That was AWESOME"! Me, being sober, did NOT think it was entirely awesome. I opened my front door and said to Kate and Tara, "I don't think you'll believe what just happened to me. Seriously. Wildest Guess?"

Whoever threw the damn thing was aiming for ME, not the house, not Marc. Someone wanted to break an egg. On ME. Who would throw an egg at me?

Who indeed?

Photoramadamadingdong!

2006-04-27T08:04:00.000-04:00

This past weekend, as I'm *sure* I mentioned, I went to visit my manz in MN. It was wonderful! The weather was in the upper 50's with a breeze and lotsa sunshine, we did much eating & drinking, I met and was well-recieved by family, and we had an otherwise NC-17 time.

We did however take a trip to the Sculpture Gardens in Minneapolis. Here are just a few photographic memos:

Prometheus strangles the Vulture statue.

This awesome Geo-dome thingie with lots of stuff "caught" in the dome portion. Here is a turtle.

My favorite! A big Glass Fish!!! Inside was sculpted metal and wood "innards". I could have sat down and stared at this for hours. Beautiful!!!

I am a master of Optical Illusion!!! Here I am at the famous Giant Cherry-On-A-Spoon Bridge/Fountain thingie.

Not taken at sculpture gardens, but on the Boy's previously-mentioned big overstuffed fake leather couch later that day. My forehead consists of what, like...70 percent of this picture? SADE!!!

Seriously. Shut up, dogs.

2006-04-26T15:36:00.000-04:00

My poor feet! I wore heels all. day. When I took them off (FINALLY!!!) I was somewhat reminded of cartoon feet, all red and pulsing, with little shock lines coming off of them. One thing to add to my grocery list is Dr. Scholl's insoles for women. I bought a suit today, Yes! A suit! Mostly because for my work you have to have at least one very suity suit, and I've got two big client meetings on monday. And also because it was MAJORLY on sale at the Crate, which is a place I normally avoid like the plague. For some reason today I went in there and left with a very nice (too lazy to go check the label) suit for $31.00!!! It's also nice that this is the first time in...oh, three years that I've been able to shop at the Crate, due to the de-fattening of my ass. (Total weight lost since January: 19 lbs.)

Oh, and if you guys have been wondering where the pictures are from this past weekend's trek to MN, well...so have I. Bobi was suppossed to send them to me last night. I even made a special post-bedtime phone call to remind him. He's so adorably forgetful.

I have to be out of my apartment in 4 weeks. I haven't packed a damn thing. I've not prepared for my moving sale this weekend. I haven't been on the ball with my job. I've got so much to do.

I think I'll go get some chinese dumplings and watch Lost with Skylar.

Norse Grog for Your Ambulance Driver

2006-04-25T07:41:00.000-04:00

It's 7:30 a.m. eastern-standard time. I was just sitting here, enjoying a cup o' thick & muddy (Norse Grog, compliments of B.'s mom, Delicious!) when someone starts pounding on my door.

I tiptoe to the front door and peek out the window. Where I see an ambulance. What the...? So I open the door a hair and look out. It's my friend Marc! Unexpected visits from friends are always nice...just more so when I've brushed my teeth and put on a bra and also more clothes. He laughed and said they had to drop off a patient at the nearby hospital and he thought they'd pull into my drive way with the sirens/lights going, except he didn't want to wake the crackheads. So I gave him some coffee and sent him on his merry. Boys. I suspect this was a fact-finding mission to see what my friend Kate told him about their outing to New Brookland Tavern this weekend.

I hate it when my friends make a Horses Ass out of themselves. And I'm not around to see it.

Has anyone seen the trailer for The Promise? It looks to be quite good.

Boys are dirty!

2006-04-24T17:36:00.000-04:00

Let's just say that the red carpet was not quite as unfurled for the second visit, cleaning-wise.

That bathroom. Dear gods. Nothing will get that many layers of toothpaste globbies out of the sink short of napalm. And I CAN NOT stress enough, the importance of a bath mat.

Other than the messiness that is my love's apaprtment, it was the perfect weekend.

Per. Fect.

Here's something my manz concoted, with a little help from me.

1. The evil villain summons a ball of energy to destroy the Earth in five minutes. You…
a) Stall for time, knowing (like DBZ) this five minutes will take forty episodes.
b) Run like hell for that last piece of cake you were saving.
c) Selflessly throw yourself at the villain, only to find out he was just kinda gay for you.
d) Realize that you’ve been on peyote for, like, six days and it might be all in your head?
Of course I would normally go with D, peyote. However...what kind of cake are we talking about here? Because if "Cheese" or "Red Velvet" is the prefix, then most definitely B.

2. Waffles or a straight bottle of Worcesth… Worchse… Worschestshcesiter… you know what I’m asking.

Waffles, Belgian Waffles

3. 00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?
a) Hair.
b) A bunny in a snowsuit?
c) I’ve determined the velocity of my homework so well that it could be anywhere in the universe.
d) Yitzak Rabin.

I will, of course go with my own answer, B. A bunny in a snowsuit.

4. You want soup or salad with that?

If you have Bleu Cheese Vineagrette, then salad. If you have Ministrone, then soup. If you have neither, then lemons. If you have both, then Billy Idol. With Lemon.

5. Of the movies, “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves”, “I, Robot”, “Johnny Mnemonic”, and “Steel Magnolias”, which one would you most likely show at your nephew’s bris?

I have a nephew? What has my brother been up to? "School", indeed!

6.
a) You didn’t ask anything.
b) Yes, I did.
c) My hair smells like tumescence!
d) I always wear flip-flops in the shower!

After this weekend, I will always wear flip-flops in yourshower.

7. Alan Rickman stars in a new action/thriller/comedy/drama about a man with one leg who must save a young boy from his psychotic, axe-wielding mother at Christmas-time, all while resolving his commitment issues with his girlfriend, Shirlena. What is the title?

Moonstruck

8. Who would you more like to see as a Celebrity Jedi Chef? Dennis Hopper or Sidney Poitier?

Hopper. But only if he screams at the top of his lungs "HEINEKEN?!? FUCK THATSHIT!!! PABST BLUE RIBBON!!!

9. It’s about 50 ft at a 23 degree angle to the green. You’re in the rough, the sun is in your eyes, and there’s a stiff wind from the northeast. Do you
a) Call in an airstrike and nuke those bastards to hell!
b) Calmly inform Reginald that no, you won’t be having “the usual” today, and Susan can put away the bottles.
c) Slowly disrobe and adopt a pose of placid contemplation.
d) Hum the “Meow Mix” song.

Meow meow meow meow/meow meow meow meow/meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow!

(I actually had to hum that as I typed all those 'meows' to ensure I got it right)

10. You turn your Bag of Holding inside out, effectively creating an uncontained infinite space in a finite space. The limits of reality warp and you are now able to instantaneously go anywhere without moving at all. Where do you go besides Hoboken, NJ?

Billy Idol's Lemon Slice.

Greetings from MN!

2006-04-22T10:28:00.000-04:00

Yesterday when I left Columbia it was already climbing rapidly twords 80 degrees. I would guesstimate it's in the lower 50's here. And it feels awesome. So far, other than the Hardest Seats Ever in the Beer Can of A Plane, it's been a great visit. I got to meet Tolbs! He is now my Jeopardy/Tetris coach.

Today at lunch I get to meet the family. Here's hoping all my food makes it to my mouth.

OH! And, as promised...Some of my painstakingly hand-made jewlery.

Green Beads
BALLS!!!
More Green Beads
Silver Triple-strand bracelet with amber beads

Two Numbered Posts In One Day!

2006-04-20T15:30:00.000-04:00

Stolen from Spinning Girl, Six Oddities about myself.

1. I like to make words up and then force them into everyday jargon. Words like...Hellosical, The Meep-Meep, and Wibble. Okay, Wibble isn't mine, it's B's, but I still use it.

2. I am totally addicted to the VH1 "I love the ____" shows. The 70's, 80's, 90's, Holidays, Toys. And no matter how many times I've seen them, if they are on, I must watch. Call it a Hal Sparks thing.

3. I could eat Cool Whip by the gallon. PLAIN.

4. I find it completely impossible to sleep in the middle of the bed. I MUST have a side! But this frustrates me, because here I (or rather, my ex) paid for all this bed and there's half of it, just going to waste!

5. I really really love the smell of scotch tape. Smells like christmas.

6. My new obsession is making jewlery while watching stand up comedy. Of course this means it takes longer to make stuff, because everytime I laugh, beads go a'flying!